CHARLIE CHAN AT THE RACE TRACK

Keye Luke and Warner Oland

CHARLIE CHAN AT THE RACE TRACK (1936). Director: H. Bruce Humberstone.

Charlie Chan (Warner Oland) uncovers skulduggery surrounding a race horse when its jockey (Frankie Darro of Burn 'Em Up Barnes) throws a race, and that's only the beginning. On shipboard, the horse's owner is found trampled to death but Chan quickly deduces that it was not an accident and the horse is not to blame. Suspects and other characters include Lee Chan (Keye Luke) who pretends to be a steward to help/hinder his father; Alice Fenton (Helen Wood), Bruce Rogers (Thomas Beck), jockey Eddie Brill (Junior Coghlan of The Adventures of Captain Marvel); horse owner George Chester (Alan Dinehart of Seven Days Ashore); and his daughter, Catherine (Gloria Roy). There's also a mischievous monkey called Lollipop; a groom named Streamline (John Henry Allen, who seems to be doing a Stepin Fetchit imitation); and when offered refreshment, Chan asks not for spirits but sarsaparilla. Charlie actually discusses blood spatter evidence at one point, proving such matters were invoked decades before CSI and Henry Lee.

Verdict: Fun, as usual, if not topnotch Chan. **1/2.

CHARLIE CHAN AT THE OPERA

"Warner Oland vs. Boris Karloff"

CHARLIE CHAN AT THE OPERA (1936). Director: H. Bruce Humberstone.

"The opera is going on tonight even if Frankenstein walks in!"

The San Marco Opera company is beset with major problems when prima donna Lilli Rochelle (Margaret Irving) receives death threats from an unknown person. The chief suspect is baritone Gravelle (Boris Karloff), who has just escaped from an asylum, but it is also true that Lilli is carrying on with baritone Enrico Barelli (Gregory Gaye) and this hardly sits well with Lilli's husband, nor Barelli's wife, Anita (Nedda Harrigan). Then there's young Kitty (Charlotte Henry) and her boyfriend, Phil (Thomas Beck) who desperately need to see Lilli but won't say why. Then the murders occur and a fiend stalks the opera house ... The words above the title read "Warner Oland vs. Boris Karloff" which is not quite what happens, but close, and both give excellent performances. Keye Luke is on hand and sharp as ever as Number One Son, and William Demarest plays the rather racist and insulting cop, Kelly. The opera "Carnival" was not a real opera but a pastiche put together by Oscar Levant [The Cobweb]; it resembles Italian verismo. There is a moving wind-up, and Karloff's dubbed [uncredited] singing voice is wonderful. One of the best and most entertaining Chan films, even if some things have to be taken with a grain of salt.

Verdict: Not surprising that that genius Chan is an opera fan. ***.

CHARLIE CHAN AT THE OLYMPICS

Warner Oland and C. Henry Gordon

CHARLIE CHAN AT THE OLYMPICS (1937). Director: H. Bruce Humberstone.

Edwards (David S. Horsley) is piloting a plane that can also fly with a new remote control device, when he takes off for parts unknown. He is later found murdered -- the question is: who killed him, where is the device, who stole it, and who do they intend to sell it to? Charlie Chan (Warner Oland) tries to find the answers to these questions while in Berlin for the Olympics, where Number One Son Lee (Keye Luke) is entered in the swimming competition. Characters embroiled in this mystery include fellow competitor Betty (Pauline Moore); her boyfriend Richard (Allan Lane of King of the Mounties); slinky Yvonne Roland (Katherine DeMille), who sports a much-remarked-upon white fox fur and seems to have a hankering for Richard; Inspector Strasser (Frederick Vogeding), who wishes to demonstrate German efficiency; Cartwright (John Eldredge), who invented the stolen device; filibuster Arthur Hughes (C. Henry Gordon of Thirteen Women), who wants to buy said device; and Hopkins (Jonathan Hale of Strangers on a Train), who also has a vested interest in the proceedings. While not necessarily one of the better Chan films this installment especially serves as a kind of time capsule as it takes place at the historic pre-war Olympics and at one point Chan even travels on the Hindenburg. The acting is good, with Gordon being especially vivid. DeMille -- a Linda Darnell sound-alike -- was the adopted daughter of Cecil DeMille and was married to Anthony Quinn. At one point Lee Chan gets kidnapped; his younger brother, Charlie Chan Jr. [Number Two Son] also appears and is very well played by charming child actor Layne Tom Jr. (He later played both Tommy and Willie Chan.) Charlie Chan at the Olympics is interesting in that it plays around with exactly who the bad guys and good guys are throughout the movie.

Verdict: Interesting Chan entry. **1/2.

CHARLIE CHAN ON BROADWAY

Warner Oland, J. Edward Bromberg and Harold Huber

CHARLIE CHAN ON BROADWAY (1937). Director: Eugene Forde.

Charlie Chan (Warner Oland) stops over in New York with Number One Son Lee (Keye Luke) and attends yet another banquet in his honor. While this occurs, Lee winds up rounded up as a suspect in the murder of a young lady of dubious reputation, Billie (Louise Henry), whom they met on the boat. Billie was involved with Burke (Douglas Fowley of Three on a Ticket), who owns the Hottentot Club, but he now seems more interested in dancer, Marie (Joan Woodbury of Brenda Starr, Reporter). The third lady in the case is reporter Joan Wendall (Joan Marsh) who has a romantic rivalry with fellow scribe "Speed" Patten (Donald Woods). Others involved include editor Murdock (J. Edward Bromberg); slick operator Buzz Moran (Leon Ames); Thomas Mitchell (Marc Lawrence of Jigsaw) who's been following Billie; and Inspector Nelson (Harold Huber) of the NYPD. From the title one would figure this is a backstage mystery, but it has nothing to do with the theater, more's the pity, although it is reasonably entertaining if not especially memorable. Oland and Luke are as good as ever; that big-faced gal Woodbury is excellent as Marie and does a lively dance number; and Henry and Marsh are also notable. Huber is perhaps a bit too exuberant -- but good -- and Leon Ames hits the right note as he generally does. An interesting aspect to the plot is that the Hottentot Club has a "Candid Camera" Night where patrons take pictures of the other customers with their own cameras and one of them wins a prize -- nothing much comes of this, however, as the photo that figures in the solution is taken by a reporter. An unexpected denouement caps the proceedings.

Verdict: Amiable Chan vehicle with some good acting. **1/2.

CHARLIE CHAN AT MONTE CARLO

"Tongue often hang men quicker than rope." 

CHARLIE CHAN AT MONTE CARLO (1937). Director: Eugene Forde.

Charlie Chan (Warner Oland) is in Monte Carlo with Number One Son Lee (Keye Luke) but takes a cab to Nice to catch a flight. Along the ride they come across a limo with a corpse in the back seat and a missing chauffeur. Victor Karnoff (Sidney Blackmer) explains to Chan and Inspector Joubert (Harold Huber) that the dead man is a bank messenger who was carrying a fortune in now-missing bonds. Others embroiled in the mystery include Karnoff's wife, Joan (Kay Linaker of The Night Before the Divorce); her brother, Gordon (Robert Kent of Who's Guilty?); the adventuress he's smitten with, Evelyn (Virginia Field); rival financier Savarin (Edward Raquello); and a hotel bartender named Rogers (George Lynn of The Werewolf). There are more murders and a neat conclusion. This was Oland's last performance as Chan and last picture before his death the following year. He and Luke are marvelous, as usual, and the personality of flamboyant cop Joubert fits Huber to a "t." Linaker and Kent are fine and Field [Repeat Performance] gives a typically vital performance.

Verdict: Not a bad way for Warner Oland to exit. ***.

THE STORY OF TEMPLE DRAKE

THE STORY OF TEMPLE DRAKE (1933). Director: Stephen Roberts.

"If I was the old judge I'd marry her off quick!"

This first film version of William Faulkner's "Sanctuary" concerns the flighty young lady Temple Drake (Miriam Hopkins), granddaughter of a judge, who goes out one night with drunken Toddy (William Collier Jr.) and winds up in a dilapidated house occupied by a gang of bootleggers. Although the young and somewhat "slow" Tommy (James Eagles) tries to protect her, she is raped by the brutish if slick "Trigger" (Jack La Rue) after he murders Tommy. A frightened and ashamed Temple goes off with Trigger, and her close friend Stephen (William Gargan) winds up defending Trigger's associate Lee (Irving Pichel) on the charge of murdering Tommy. Can he convince Temple to not think of herself and her reputation and testify as to Lee's innocence? The Story of Temple Drake has little to do with Faulkner's original story -- the ending is completely changed -- but it is well-directed for the most part and features competent (if never outstanding) performances. Hopkins has her moments but is uneven, possibly due to her role. Florence Eldridge plays Lee's wife, and there are appearances by Elizabeth Patterson and Grady Sutton. Photographed by Karl Struss, who has one scene in complete darkness except for the lighted tip of Trigger's cigarette. Remade in 1961 as Sanctuary.

Verdict: Rather unpleasant all told. **1/2.

SANCTUARY

SANCTUARY (1961). Director: Tony Richardson.

A housekeeper named Nancy (Odetta) is sentenced to hang because she murdered an infant, but strangely the baby's mother, Temple (Lee Remick), wants to save the murderess' life. To that end she tells her father, Governor Drake (Howard St. John) what transpired during some very dark days in her past. In this second film version of William Faulkner's "Sanctuary" after The Story of Temple Drake [with parts of Faulkner's sequel, "Requiem for a Nun" thrown into the mix], Temple again winds up at a bootlegger's hide-out, is raped by "Candy Man" (Yves Montand) and taken to a whorehouse, but eventually winds up married to straight arrow Gowan Stevens (Bradford Dillman), whereupon she hires old associate Nancy to look after her children. Sanctuary idiotically tries to convince the viewer that somehow her infant's murder is all her fault, which is so morally moronic it isn't funny. And that isn't the only problem with the movie. Montand is screamingly miscast as the rapist ["Wanna dwink?" he asks Dillman in one hilarious scene], and although Remick has given some nice performances elsewhere, she is defeated by the sheer stupidity of James Poe's screenplay. Ironically Sanctuary emerges as more dated than The Story of Temple Drake because in this version Temple falls in love with her rapist, an odious notion that even soap operas finally began to reject in recent years. [Yes, one could argue that it's really sexual obsession, and Temple is not normal, but it's still offensive.] Dillman gives one of his "I'm not really sure what I'm doing here" performances; Harry Townes is notable as Nancy's lawyer, Ira; and Reta Shaw is fun as the painted madame of a brothel. Folksinger Odetta isn't a seasoned enough actress to make much of an impression as Nancy, but her part is so unbelievable it would tax the talents of an experienced acting genius. This very stupid movie seems to forget that there is never any justification for taking the life of an innocent child. The phony quasi-religious ending may have you screaming at the TV. In black and white CinemaScope.

Verdict: Looks like "fun," but isn't. *1/2.

JUDGE HARDY'S CHILDREN

Lewis Stone and Mickey Rooney

JUDGE HARDY'S CHILDREN (1938). Director: George B. Seitz.

Polly Benedict (Ann Rutherford) wants Andy Hardy (Mickey Rooney) to take her to a dance, but he's horrified to learn that he'll need to buy a tuxedo (it never occurs to the dope that he could rent one). Therefore it's just as well that he and the rest of the family accompany Judge Hardy (Lewis Stone) to Washington D.C. where the judge will serve on a committee exploring certain monopolies. Unfortunately, Andy becomes smitten with a pretty French gal, Suzanne (Jacqueline Laurent), who also invites him to a dance -- which is formal! Will Andy's dad give him the money to get a tuxedo? In the meantime Andy's sister Marian (Cecelia Parker) acts like a complete ass when it comes to her boyfriend and inadvertently gives away some of the committee's secrets to unscrupulous Washington types. Mickey Rooney gives another fine and funny performance as the irrepressible Andy, and has a great scene when he demonstrates the "Big Apple" dance to the French gal. Janet Beecher [So Red the Rose] makes an impression as Miss Budge, Suzanne's tutor, and the rest of the cast, especially Stone, is fine. In this entry, Aunt Millie is played by Betty Ross Clarke, who is much less of a "spinster" type. Dumb Mrs. Hardy (Fay Holden) doesn't know who Leonardo da Vinci is!

Verdict: Highly enjoyable Hardy picture. ***.

NEVER TAKE CANDY FROM A STRANGER

Patrick Allen, Budd Knapp, and Bill Nagy

NEVER TAKE CANDY FROM A STRANGER (aka Never Take Sweets from a Stranger/1960). Director: Cyril Frankel.

High school principal Peter Carter (Patrick Allen of Night Creatures) and his wife Sally (Gwen Watford) have moved to a new community with their young daughter, Jean (Janina Faye), and her grandmother, Martha (Alison Leggatt). One afternoon Jean tells her parents that she and her friend Lucille (Frances Green) were given candy by an elderly man in a house nearby who told them to take off their clothing. Peter wants to confront the old man, Sally wants to call the police, and the grandmother advises caution -- they aren't completely sure what if anything happened and the old man, Clarence Olderberry Sr. (Felix Aylmer) has a lot of clout in the town. Because of this the Carters find a lot of opposition when they have the man arrested and a trial ensues. Will the entire town turn against them and will Olderberry get away with his inappropriate behavior or get the help he clearly needs? Never Take Candy from a Stranger is a non-sensational look at a repellent subject, and is generally well-done and well-acted; Leggatt is especially good, as are Michael Gwynn [The Revenge of Frankenstein] as the prosecutor and Bill Nagy as Olderberry's son. This absorbing and distressing film leads up to a tragic and hard-hitting finale. One of the film's flaws, however, is that the "pervert" in question seems rather feeble and to be suffering from Alzheimer's, making some of his actions possibly unlikely, and his behavior perhaps more demented than criminal. A more menacing and younger antagonist, a more formidable and devious pedophile, might have given the film even more dramatic heft, although the ending is nevertheless uncompromising. Freddie Francis' cinematography gives the film a nice look, and there is a fine musical score by Elisabeth Lutyens [Paranoiac].

Verdict: Sobering look at a town's dirty secret. ***.

CHARLIE CHAN IN LONDON

Drue Leyton, Warner Oland and Ray Milland

CHARLIE CHAN IN LONDON (1934). Director: Eugene Ford.

Pamela Gray (Drue Leyton) is convinced that her brother, Paul (uncredited), is innocent of the murder of an inventor named Hamilton, but his appeal has been denied and he is facing execution. Although Pamela's fiance, Neil (Ray Milland), Paul's lawyer, doesn't believe in his client's innocence, Charlie Chan (Warner Oland) isn't so sure. He has only a couple of days to prove the man's innocence and save his life. Then there's a "suicide" of one of the suspects, and an attempt is made on Chan's life ... Among the suspects are the horse groom Lake (John Rogers); grumpy, uncooperative Major Jardine (George Barraud); Phillips, the butler (Murray Kinnell); Geoffrey Richmond (Alan Mowbray); and his girlfriend, Lady Mary (Mona Barrie), among others. Detective Sergeant Thacker is played by E. E. Clive. Considering the circumstances, Charlie Chan in London should have been a lot more suspenseful than it is, but the actors, Oland included, are more than competent and the movie is watchable. The ending is charming.

Verdict: Chan capably treading water. **1/2.

IT'S ALIVE (2008) unrated

IT'S ALIVE (2008). Director: Josef Rusnak.

In this remake of the 1974 film, about a couple whose baby is a mutant maniac, the parents have been made twenty or so years younger -- characters in horror films these days must always be twenty-somethings -- and don't have a son but a nephew in a wheelchair. One improvement this has over the original film is that the deaths of the hospital staff are treated as a mystery and not immediately attributed to an infant, which makes a lot more sense. In spite of this, it doesn't make sense that the parents aren't a little more upset over what happened in the operating theater. One bit of confusion is how the parents and others can look at the child -- who doesn't run away but is taken home by its parents -- and think of it as "normal" [see photo] -- does the baby mutate just before it goes into attack mode and look okay all the rest of the time? -- this is never made clear. The mother, Lenore (Bijou Phillips), is a bit of an airhead, and covers up for the baby's attacks, which are much, much gorier than in the original movie. James Murray plays the father, Frank, and Owen Teale is Sergeant Perkins. There are some good scenes, and a fairly exciting climax.

Verdict: A remake that ultimately isn't better than the original despite some refinements. **1/2.

HERCULES

Dawyne Johnson, Rufus Sewell, and Ian McShane

HERCULES (2014). Director: Brett Ratner.

"I can deal with an ambitious man because he can be bought. But a man with no ambition wants nothing."

Hercules (Dwayne Johnson) has finished most of his twelve labors and is now a mercenary for hire, along with some comrades, when he is importuned by Lord Cotys (John Hurt of Alien) of Thrace and his daughter, Atalanta (Ingrid Bolso Berdal),  to help them fight the warlord, Rhesus (Tobias Santelmann), who has magic  and centaurs on his side. Don't expect to see much of that magic because this is yet another mythological film that downplays the fantastic aspects of the legends in favor of warfare. However, Hercules is exciting on that level, and well-staged battle scenes get across the violence without needing to depict extreme gore. Johnson is fine as Hercules, with good support from Rufus Sewell as his comrade Autolycus, Ian McShane [The Last of Sheila] as old seer Amphiaraus, Aksel Hennie as crazy Tydeus, and Reece Ritchie, as Hercules' nephew Iolaus. There's only one monstrous creature in the whole movie, and it looks like video game imagery, but the movie is nicely photographed. This is somewhat better than The Legend of Hercules, which was also released in 2014.

Verdict: Entertaining action flick with muscles. ***.

THE BROTHERHOOD

Misleading poster for "Brotherhood"

THE BROTHERHOOD (1968). Director: Martin Ritt. Produced by Kirk Douglas.

Frank Ginetta (Kirk Douglas of Seven Days in May) is overjoyed that his younger brother Vincent (Alex Cord of The Dead Are Alive) wants to join him in the "family" business, but Vince's new wife, Emma (Susan Strasberg) isn't so sure. Her own father, Dominick Bertolo (Luthor Adler of House of Strangers) is in the business and warns Vinnie that Frank is too old-fashioned and objecting to one good deal after another -- this could have serious repercussions not only for Frank but for Vincent. Then Frank discovers that Bertolo was the man who betrayed his father and many other mafioso years ago, and sets out to get revenge, setting in motion events that will have violent consequences ... The Brotherhood pre-dates The Godfather by several years, and while it is not as good, it is not a bad picture, with some effective performances. It's hard to figure out if Frank is supposed to have an accent or not because it comes and goes, but Douglas is good in the role. Cord is not an especially dynamic performer, but he has several effective moments. The film was a box office loser, probably because the studio used a poster showing Douglas and Cord kissing on the mouth. [Not even The Boys in the Band used such an image.] In the movie the kiss, which is shown from a different angle, is one of several affectionate good-bye kisses Frank gives his brother, and is not indicative of homoerotic incest. At least France retitled the film "The Sicilian Brothers" to make it more clear what was going on. Murray Hamilton and Eduardo Ciannelli make a good impression as fellow members of the brotherhood; Strasberg is given little to do. One of the best, most chilling scenes in the movie has Frank relating to Bertolo how he befriended a man he intended to kill and having absolutely no clue as to the complete immorality of what he's describing.

Verdict: Creditable mafia drama. ***.

THE PERILS OF PAULINE (1947)

Betty Hutton and John Lund

THE PERILS OF PAULINE (1947). Director: George Marshall.

Pearl White (Betty Hutton) leaps from a factory job into "show business" when she joins a traveling theater company with the help of a dowager named Julia (Constance Collier). Tired of her mistreatment by the dreamy head of the troupe, Michael Farrington (John Lund of No Man of Her Own), she walks off and finds herself in silent pictures, becoming the great and wealthy serial heroine of The Perils of Pauline and others. But when she offers Michael a job as her leading man will it lead to lasting love for the couple or just disaster? The Perils of Pauline is very loosely based on the life of Pearl White, which actually had enough drama in it without the screenwriter's inventions. Hutton, never one of my favorites, is excellent, however, and she gets good support from Lund (playing a truly obnoxious character whose good looks only make slightly more palatable), Collier [Rope], Billy De Wolfe, and William Demarest as a film director. Songs by Frank Loesser [The Most Happy Fella] include "Rumble," "I Wish I Didn't Love You So," and "Papa Don't Preach." In real life serials were made very quickly, but in this the filming of The Perils of Pauline stretches out for years and years!

Verdict: Hutton in fine form and an entertaining biopic, if mostly balderdash. ***.

THE KISS OF THE VAMPIRE

THE KISS OF THE VAMPIRE (1963). Director: Don Sharp.

Gerald (Edward de Souza of The Phantom of the Opera) and Marianne Harcourt (Jennifer Daniel) are traveling by motorcar in Europe, when they are forced to stop in an obscure village due to mechanical problems. At the inn they encounter the pleasant and dignified Dr. Ravna (Noel Willman) and the slightly manic Professor Zimmer (Clifford Evans of The Curse of the Werewolf), who not only gives them a warning about Ravna but about even staying in the village overnight. Ravna, along with his son Carl (Barry Warren) and daughter Sabena (Jacquie Wallis), is the head of a cult of vampires, and they've set their sights on initiating poor Marianne into the bloodsucking fold. Can Gerald put a stop to this dastardly plan with the help of Professor Zimmer? The Kiss of the Vampire badly needs the presence of Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing, and it simply lacks the usual Hammer panache, although the climax when hundreds of bats invade Ravna's castle is memorable. Don Sharp also directed Curse of the Fly.

Verdict: Ho hum Hammer horror film. **1/2.

DISHONORED LADY

DISHONORED LADY (1947). Director: Robert Stevenson.

"You're a voluptuous pain in the neck."

"I'm mad about you -- in my own foul way."

Beautiful New York City magazine editor Madeleine Damian (Hedy Lamarr) tries to kill herself out of what seems to be ennui and is counseled by a rather patronizing psychiatrist (Morris Carnovsky), who encourages her to start a brand new life for herself. She meets a handsome scientist, David (Dennis O'Keefe), who lives upstairs and falls in love, but then her past intrudes, in the form of sleazy lover boy Felix Courtland (John Loder) and even sleazier former co-worker Jack Garet (William Lundigan). When Madeleine is accused of murder, David turns against her in the snap of a finger! [Why anyone would expect such a beautiful woman not to have admirers and previous boyfriends ... !] Lamarr [Crossroads] and the other actors are perfectly fine in this, but the screenplay is a load of rot. Paul Cavanagh and Natalie Schafer [Female on the Beach] are their usual adept selves as Madeleine's former associates, and there are appearances by Margaret Hamilton as a landlady, and Douglass Dumbrille as a prosecutor; both are swell. (Ms. Damian is quite a woman: it's not that she doesn't scream at the sight of a mouse, but that she's actually able to grab and pick up one of the little vermin without trouble! Faster than a mouse? Sure!)  It's fun to watch those two blond Hollywood pretty boys, O'Keefe and Lundigan [The White Orchid], having a knockdown, drag-out battle -- guess who wins? Lundigan is effective in an unusual bad boy role for him.

Verdict: An attractive, competent cast doesn't hurt, but oh that story! **.

THE CURTAIN FALLS

Henrietta Crosman

THE CURTAIN FALLS (1934). Director: Charles Lamont.

A broke elderly woman crosses the Atlantic, shows up at an old British manor house, and announces to the family that she is Aunt Hettie, the infamous Lady Scorsby. Accepted into the family Hettie sees that there are problems that need her attention, and she sets out to make things right. Dorothy (Dorothy Lee) has fallen in love with a man, Barry (William Bakewell of Battle of the Sexes), of whom the family doesn't approve, and her mother Katherine (Natalie Moorhead) is falling for the married Lothario, Martin (Jameson Thomas). Her husband, John (Holmes Herbert of Daughter of the Dragon), has had business reversals and is living on bluff. His son Allan (John Darrow) owes a great deal of money to gambling den owner Taggart (Eddie Kane). But the biggest secret is held by Hettie herself. As a drama this film is no great shakes, but it's bolstered by the performance of Crosman and has a moving wind-up and several adept portrayals from the supporting cast. Hettie putting one over on Taggart in his own crooked gambling den is a highlight of the movie. Lamont was a prolific director of certain Abbott and Costello movies as well as such films as Chip Off the Old Block.

Verdict: An engaging lead performance and an interesting situation never hurt. ***.

THE SIGNAL (2014)

THE SIGNAL (2014). Director: William Eubank.

Nic (Brenton Thwaites), and his friends Jonah (Beau Knapp) and Haley (Olivia Cooke) decide to track down a computer hacker who seems to be everywhere, even invading the cameras in their laptops. The trio track a signal to a dilapidated old house, but all of them wind up in a secret scientific-military base where they, especially Nic, are subjected to tests and persistent questioning. The movie is meant to be creepy and suspenseful one supposes, but it's actually tedious and uninvolving, despite basically good performances by Brenton Thwaites -- what a moniker! -- and the other young cast members. Laurence Fishburne [Event Horizon] is cast as the lead interrogator in the base, and is (deliberately?) weird. Although you more or less get the explanation for what's going on at the very end, it's not worth the trip. Ultimately this is an old comic book -- or shaggy dog -- story.

Verdict: A signal you should probably ignore. *1/2.

WHITE CHRISTMAS

Percy Helton gives Kaye and Der Bingle a hard time

WHITE CHRISTMAS (aka Irving Berlin's White Christmas/1954). Director: Michael Curtiz.

Grateful that he saved his life in WW2, singer Bob Wallace (Bing Crosby) teams up with his buddy, Phil Davis (Danny Kaye) when they return to civilian life. The two become a rich and successful team, and are called upon to advise the singing sister duo of an old Army buddy. Bob falls for Betty (Rosemary Clooney) and Phil has special feelings for Judy (Vera-Ellen). However, there are complications, and the two men follow the gals to their engagement at an inn in Vermont, which turns out to be owned by their former commanding officer, General Waverly (Dean Jagger). Can they do something to win the girls' hearts and save the inn and the general from bankruptcy? The first picture presented in VistaVision, White Christmas is amiable enough, but aside from some standard tunes by Irving Berlin, it's minor, and the plot is a dog. Der Bingle and Kaye play well together, as do the two gals, with Clooney giving a truly warm and sympathetic performance. Vera-Ellen is a terrific dancer primarily, and she struts her stuff in one number with a male partner, and yet another set to the tune of "Mandy" (which I'd always believed was composed by Victor Herbert but is actually a bonafide Berlin tune). One interesting thing about the movie is that while it's basically fluff, it begins with a rather somber sequence overseas near the end of the war -- while the two men sing the wonderful "White Christmas" there are shots of the homesick soldiers, near tears, thinking about their families back home. However, the attempt to create another lump in the throat with a climactic tribute to the general doesn't quite work -- surely a simple reunion would have made more sense, but this is Hollywood and you need a big finish! The performances from the leads and Jagger are all good, Mary Wickes shows up as a housekeeper at the inn (but her scenes are limited, unfortunately), and we even get the ubiquitous Percy Helton as a train conductor interacting with Bing and Danny! The gals' big number, "Sisters," has pretty much become high-camp and the quartet"s "Snow" is Berlin at his worst.

Verdict:  Nice songs and dancing but once is enough. **1/2.

ABOUT MRS. LESLIE

Robert Ryan and Shirley Booth

ABOUT MRS. LESLIE (1954). Director: Daniel Mann.

Vivian Leslie (Shirley Booth) operates a boarding house out of her suburban home and tries not to get too involved in the lives of her tenants. After Pixie (Eilene Janssen), the spoiled teenage girl next door, tells her she should mind her business because she's never been married or had children, Vivian thinks back to her relationship with a man named George Leslie (Robert Ryan), who is a Civil War aficionado. Was he her husband, or wasn't he? .. Since the movie is unpredictable I won't say any more about the plot, but the picture holds the attention. After winning both a Tony and an Oscar for her role in the stage and screen versions of Come Back, Little Sheba, Shirley Booth co-starred in this interesting soap opera although her performance is a trifle uneven. She and Ryan play well-together even if you can't quite see them as a couple. Interspersed with the flashbacks is the secondary love story of dancer Lan McKay (Alex Nicol) and aspiring actress Nadine (Marjie Millar). Although About Mrs. Leslie is in many ways a nice picture, the fact remains that much of it is superficial and doesn't ring true -- some scenes haven't the required impact -- and Ryan's character is not altogether commendable. Great Old Movies' favorite Percy Helton figures in a funny scene wherein he plays a restaurant owner. Alex Nicol [Because of You] gives a good performance, but Marjie Millar, who had a tragic life and early death, can't act, sadly. Nicol later directed The Screaming Skull.

Verdict: Unsatisfying but intriguing soaper. **1/2.

THE GREAT RACE

Blink and you'll miss her: Vivian Vance

THE GREAT RACE (1965). Director: Blake Edwards.

Near the turn of the century, rival daredevils Professor Fate (Jack Lemmon) and the Great Leslie (Tony Curtis), among others, embark on a race from New York to Paris (they go way up north and head for Siberia to make their way into Europe). They are joined by Maggie Dubois (Natalie Wood), a suffragette and wannabee reporter. Along the way -- the very longgg way -- they have assorted misadventures ... Frankly, I only put on The Great Race because I heard Vivian Vance [The Blue Veil] was in it. Unfortunately, "Ethel" -- now playing the wife of newspaper editor Arthur O'Connell -- is a mere "guest star" and is on screen for at best a minute and a half. Boo hiss! Worse, the movie is nearly three hours long. No, it's not awful and there are enough entertaining moments and good acting to keep you watching, but there's no need for this picture to be so long. (The movie is, rather presumptuously, dedicated to Laurel and Hardy, who certainly never needed three hours to make a funny movie!) Probably inspired by the success of such mammoth productions as Around the World in 80 Days and It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World, The Great Race is bloated and episodic, with way too many digressions. There is a long and unnecessary detour involving a foppish (or stereotypically gay?) prince who happens to be a lookalike of Fate's, a sequence which could and should have been excised from the final cut, despite some good performances from Lemmon as the prince and George Macready as a conniving member of his court. A sequence for some reason situated in the old west has Dorothy Provine [Kiss the Girls and Make Them Die] -- looking sort of like a monkey with a bouffant hairpiece that threatens to topple off of her head any minute -- belting out a terrible number, but at least it leads into a fairly rousing bar fight. On the other hand, a pie fight that caps the prince sequence goes on too long (keeping in with the "theme" of the movie) and hasn't a single laugh. Oddly, the best scene in the movie is a well-cut and choreographed sword and saber fight between Curtis and Ross Martin that isn't played for laughs but plays. Jack Lemmon is in manic mode (as he was in Luv) throughout the movie but is effective on that sometimes irritating level. Curtis and Wood are Curtis and Wood, although they are well-coached in their line readings. Keenan Wynn, Larry Storch, Macready and Martin make a better impression.

Verdict: Not quite "Blake's Folly" -- but not for lack of trying. **1/2.

ESCORT FOR HIRE

Pete Murray and Noel Thevarthen

ESCORT FOR HIRE (1960). Director: Godfrey Grayson.

Two unemployed actors named Steve Walker (Noel Trevarthen) and Buzz Jenkins (Pete Murray) go to work for a male escort service run by Miss Terry Kennedy (June Thorburn of Tom Thumb). Buzz has his hands full with a glasses-wearing barracuda named Nadia (Jill Melford) while Steve is assigned to sexy Elizabeth Quinn (Jan Holden of The Stranglers of Bombay). Jealous Terry isn't pleased with reports that Steve is coming out of Elizabeth's flat smeared with lipstick, but a worse problem is what Steve finds in that woman's bedroom ... Escort for Hire wastes a provocative premise with a light mystery that plays like a slow, dull TV show, isn't very funny, and has characters saying and doing things that only badly-written characters would say and do. Handsome Trevarthen actually doesn't make much of an impression in this but he had a long list of credits. Godfrey Grayson also directed The Fake.

Verdict: Don't hire these escorts. *1/2.

THE DEVIL-SHIP PIRATES

Pirate Christopher Lee confronts John Cairney

THE DEVIL-SHIP PIRATES (1964). Director: Don Sharp.

"That sort of talk's for priests and women."

In the late 16th century Britain and Spain are engaged in war. Diablo, a licensed "privateer" ship whose men are led by Captain Robeles (Christopher Lee), has officially become part of the Spanish armada. When the ship is badly damaged in a sea battle consisting of stock footage, Robeles pulls into a small English port to make repairs. There Robeles tells the apprehensive villagers that Spain has won the war, and they are all now under his command. However, one of the pirates' female captives tries to break free so she can tell everyone the truth, although suspicions are already forming ... The Devil-Ship Pirates, co-released by Columbia and Hammer studios, has the latter's usual production gloss, but is a bit on the tepid side. Christopher Lee is more exciting as a pirate leader than he was in The Pirates of Blood River, and Andrew Kier and Michael Ripper are also in the cast. John Cairney [Spaceflight IC-1]plays the young hero, Harry. Don Sharp also directed the zestier Rasputin, the Mad Monk, also with Lee.

Verdict: Nothing special in this non-horror Hammer. **.

WISEGUY Dead Dog Records Arc

Tim Curry as the diabolical Winston Newquay

WISEGUY. The "Dead Dog Records" arc. 1989.

Because the cost of acquiring the music rights would have been too prohibitive, the "Dead Dog Records" arc from season two of Wiseguy was not included in the official DVD release, more's the pity. In this story undercover agent Vinnie Terranova (Ken Wahl) is assigned to investigate corruption in the recording industry by using federal money to buy the dying Dead Dog Records, which does not sit well with certain government officials who get no thrill out of being record moguls like Vinnie does. Deborah Harry plays a washed-up singer, Diana, who is working in a cocktail lounge when Vinnie decides to engineer her comeback, but he has to reckon with the schemes of near-psychotic music bigwig Winston Newquay (Tim Curry), the former Sam Fishbine, who is also Diana's former lover, a fact that does not sit well with his wife, Claudia (Deidre Hall). Vinnie gets assistance from the enthusiastic Bobby Travis (Glenn Frey), as well as from husband-and-wife record company owners Amber (Patti D'Arbanville) and Isaac Twine (Paul Winfield). Vinnie's producer is a coke-snorting "genius" named Johnny Medley (Paul McCrane), who is difficult to work with, to say the least, and has a sixteen-year-old wife (Pamela Segall Adlon) who is more mature than he is. [This last business is kind of creepy, frankly, but fits into the weird tone of the episodes.] With more humor and craziness than most episodes of this show, the Dead Dog arc was atypical Wiseguy -- for one thing, Vinnie seems more interested in having a hit record than in putting anyone in jail -- but it is marvelously entertaining, and the scripts by David J. Burke and Stephen Kronish, among others, probably influenced the more outrageous serial dramas of today. Highlights include a dress-tearing catfight at a fancy party, a couple making passionate love who wind up crashing through a skylight, and a certain someone who's pissed off Winston being thrown off a rooftop by thugs. The acting from the entire cast is excellent, with McCrane, Frey and Winfield taking top honors, but even they take a back seat to Tim Curry, who gives an absolutely mesmerizing and ferocious portrayal of the devilish, always sleek and sophisticated, Winston Newquay, a fascinating character -- but not one you'd want to know personally. Jonathan Banks and Jim Byrnes also appear and are as good as ever. The song Harry sings, "Brite Side" was recorded by her, but only in a version that has none of the impact of the original.

Verdict: Deliriously entertaining and sharply acted. ***1/2.

PIT STOP

Marcus DeAnda and Bill Heck

PIT STOP (2013). Director: Yen Tan.

In a small town in Texas, Gabe (Bill Heck), who is still close to his ex-wife (Heather Kafka) and children, has discovered that his male lover, still married, wants nothing more to do with him. Meanwhile, Ernesto (Marcus DeAnda) is waiting for his boyfriend, Luis (Alfredo Maduro), to finally move out even as he visits the nursing home where another ex-lover (who left him for another man) lies in a coma. Linda is clearly still in love with her husband, and goes on a date with a chubby but appealing fellow at work, Winston (John Merriman), to whom Gabe is a little cruel. Les (Corby Sullivan) is a gay teacher who goes on a date with Gabe, but is still pining for the married man who dumped him. Will Gabe and Ernesto get past their personal problems and ties and ever get together? Pit Stop, a study of pain, loss and loneliness, is low-key, well-written, and beautifully acted by the entire cast. Bill Heck has a beautifully-delivered speech in his car when he tells Les about the man he had been hoping to spend the rest of his life with and how it all went wrong. Some people see this as having a happy ending, but to me it was rather open-ended. In any case, it could have used another thirty minutes running time, the rare occasion when you think a movie is actually too short. The film is full of interesting and telling little details. Pit Stop may move a lot of people to tears -- either because they have no lover, or because they wish their lover looked like DeAnda or Heck!

Verdict: Notable independent feature with several excellent performances. ***.

THE MAN WHO COULD WORK MIRACLES

Roland Young

THE MAN WHO COULD WORK MIRACLES (aka H. G. Wells' The Man Who Could Work Miracles/1936). Director: Lothar Mendes.

"I must have a whiskey. If I don't have a whiskey my mind will give way." -- Colonel Winstanley, upon discovering that all of his whiskey has turned to water. 

British clerk George Fotheringay (Roland Young) suddenly finds himself with the ability to make whatever he wants come true, and everyone around him tells him what they would do if they were him. Should he make himself master of the world, or recreate the world for the greater good? The vicar Maydig (Ernest Thesiger) has some definite ideas on that score, but George won't allow himself to be overly influenced, unless it's by Ada (Joan Gardner), upon whom he has a crush. H. G. Wells adapted his own short story, adding many new characters as well as a framing sequence which shows that George's power was a gift from the gods [apparently the filmmakers felt that the audience would want to know exactly how Fotheringay got his powers, even if the answer isn't a terribly satisfying one]. Wells somewhat destroys a modern audience's sympathy for George when he has him trying to use his power to make Joan fall in love with him instead of the man she prefers, which is equivalent to using a date rape drug. Still, even if you've read the story, the film is unpredictable, has some fine effects work, and is very well-acted  by all. Topping even Roland Young [Topper Takes a Trip] is Ralph Richardson [The Heiress] in his excellent portrayal of the rather buffoonish Colonel Winstanley. Thesiger is also fine as the vicar, and there are notable appearances by George Zucco as the colonel's butler, Ivan Brandt as the Power Giver, and an impossibly young George Sanders and Torin Thatcher as his heavenly and cynical associates. Wells gives George a memorable speech at the climax, and the story is in its own way as influential as other works in the brilliant Wells' canon. Lothar Mendes also directed Payment Deferred.

Verdict: Intriguing and amusing. ***.

THE REMARKABLE MR. PENNYPACKER

THE REMARKABLE MR. PENNYPACKER (1959). Director: Henry Levin.

"Morality is a matter of geography."

The progressive Horace Pennypacker (Clifton Webb) has one wife and many children in one town in Pennsylvania, and a whole different family in another town in the state -- sooner or later each family will learn of the other's existence and then what? Mr. Pennypacker answers that question and manages to milk much humor out of a decidedly serious situation. It also manages to be surprisingly frank at times, if a trifle unreal. Webb is, as ever, excellent, and there are fine performances from Dorothy McGuire [Invitation] as unwitting wife, Emily; Dorothy Stickney [Murder at the Vanities] as Aunt Jane; Doro Merande [The Gazebo] as the secretary, Miss Haskins; and Charles Coburn as Grandfather Pennypacker; and there's nice support from Jill St. John as Kate. Ray Stricklyn and David Nelson are two other children, and Ron Ely is a young minister who's fallen for Kate. However entertaining the film may be, there is no denying that Horace's reasons for entering into a second bigamous marriage are rather spurious and self-centered. Still, it's hard not to like the movie on its own terms, and it even has some suspense.

Verdict: Another winning Webb performance. ***.

PRESENTING LILY MARS

PRESENTING LILY MARS (1943). Director: Norman Taurog.

"Peter Pan! Macbeth! The Follies!"

Lily Mars (Judy Garland) is a talented singer, but for some reason she decides to audition for Broadway producer John Thornway (Van Heflin) -- who comes from the same small town and whose father delivered her -- by doing a scene from Shakespeare, in which she stinks. Lily follows Thornway to New York, where he's staging a new show starring Isobel Rekay (Marta or Martha Eggerth). Is Lily a desperate and naive amateur or a coldly calculating, rather pushy worldling who knows full well what she's doing? In this simplistic movie in which the key to Broadway stardom is to become an annoying pest and vamp the producer, we're supposed to believe the former, but I'm not so sure. In any case, things don't work out so smoothly for Lily until the Hollywood happy ending. Presenting Lily Mars was originally a novel by that fine American writer Booth Tarkington, whose books Alice Adams and The Magnificent Ambersons, among others, were turned into pretty good movies. While I've read the first two excellent novels, I've not read Presenting Lily Mars, but it had to be better than this treacle, which is simply a standard Judy Garland Movie when it could have been a whole lot more. That being said, Lily Mars is by no means a bad movie, with Garland in her reasonably effective cutesy mode between child and adult, and Van Heflin, as good as ever, managing to play quite well with her.

The movie has many charming elements. The brother (Douglas Croft of the Batman serial) who steals and collects doorbells. The younger sisters who sob along with Judy/Lily whenever she's upset [they are a cute bunch]. In an early development Judy does a scene outside Thornway's home which causes some of his associates to think he knocked her up and abandoned her, and there's the eyebrow-raising scene when Thornway has playwright Owen Vail (Richard Carlson) stand in for Isobel in a love scene. When Owen keeps it up after the scene is over Thornway tells him to stop kidding around. "Who's kidding?" says Owen, in a scene meant as a joke but which probably caused some fluttering among nervous censors. [Lily watches all this wide-eyed and confused.] Connie Gilchrist [A Woman's Face] makes her mark as an ex-actress who does a number with Judy, who also nails "Tom the Piper" and "When I Look at You." My favorite scene has Isobel giving her black maid, Rosa (Lillian Yarbo of Between Us Girls), a hat that she no longer wants because Lily wears a copy of it. When Isobel sees the maid wearing it, she commands her to throw it out. Later both of them see a chimp wearing the hat, which infuriates Isobel even as the maid, having the last laugh, smiles behind her back.

Spring Byington is wonderful as Lily's mother, as is Ray McDonald as her boyfriend, whom she discards early on. Fay Bainter is also notable if a bit wasted as Thornway's mom. Bob Crosby and Tommy Dorsey also make appearances. Despite a fairly nice if unspectacular voice, Eggerth doesn't make much of an impression, which may be why she was hired -- this, after all, is a Judy Garland Movie and nobody better get more attention than her.

Verdict: Silly but enthusiastic twaddle with a dignified Heflin and energetic Garland. **1/2.