MY SON THE HERO

Patsy Kelly and Roscoe Karns

MY SON THE HERO (1943). Director: Edgar G. Ulmer.

"Big Time" Morgan (Roscoe Karns) is not exactly in the big time, and is afraid that his son, Michael (Joseph Allen of The Night Before the Divorce), who is a well-known war correspondent, will think less of him if he knows his dad is a failure. Big Time manages to set up an elaborate scam by moving into a wealthy man's mansion, and before you can say "apple Annie," he's ensconced there with a fake wife, Gertie (Patsy Kelly) and daughter-in-law Linda (Carol Hughes of Meet the Boyfriend), and his pugilist client, "Kid Slug" Rosenthal (Maxie Rosenbloom). Then there is the arrival of Morgan's ex-wife, Cynthia (Joan Blair), as well as Nancy (Lois Collier of Weird Woman), the daughter of the man who actually owns the mansion. As Michael tries to sell $100,000 in war bonds at a fete in the mansion, Linda and Nancy both find themselves attracted to Michael, even as Morgan and his ex-wife rekindle their relationship -- and so on ... My Son the Hero is amiable enough thanks to the actors, and it isn't terribly boring, but somehow it never quite emerges as anything even remotely worthwhile. The script seems to have been cobbled together even as the low-budget PRC production was being shot.

Verdict: You'll forget this even as you're watching it. **.

JUNGLE QUEEN

JUNGLE QUEEN (13 chapter Universal serial/1945). Directors: Lewis D. Collins; Ray Taylor.

"They're walking into their graves and don't know it."

In 1939 on the eve of WW II, the Nazis have sent agents to the "dark continent" believing it is a necessary strategy to take over Africa, and are using "Tambosa" as their base of operations. One of the German agents is Dr. Elise Bork (Tala Birell) who runs an experimental farm, and works with another Nazi named Lang (Douglass Dumbrille). On the side of the angels are Bob Eliot (Edward Norris) and his buddy Chuck (Eddie Quillan), who go on a mission to Africa and share a plane with Pamela Courtney (Lois Collier), whom they suspect of being an imposter until they all wind up lost in the jungle after the plane crashes. The Nazis are trying to force control upon the natives, but they are less successful with a weird white queen named Lothel (Ruth Roman), who shows up unannounced  to make pronouncements, give advice to the natives, and rescue the boys and Pamela; Lothel is also impervious to bullets [where the hell she came from is never explained]. Then there's the "Sword of Tangu," which has a supposed secret, and is coveted by some of the characters. This is a fairly ridiculous serial but it's often entertaining, the leads are all competent, and it has everyone from Cyril Delevanti to Cy Kendall [the untalented Charles Laughton] in the supporting cast. Pamela is nearly eaten by hungry gators and mauled by a lion, there's a volcanic eruption that sends buildings and statues toppling, and Bob is pursued by dozens of salivating crocs in a river, nearly falls into a pit of lions, and is subjected with the others to a deadly gas attack. Birell had a notable role in The Monster Maker and Collier was in Flying Disc Man from Mars and many other movies.

 Verdict: For all of its flaws, it's one of the better Universal chapterplays. ***.

FLYING DISC MAN FROM MARS

FLYING DISC MAN FROM MARS (1950). 12 chapter Republic serial. Director: Fred C. Brannon.

Just as in the earlier Purple Monster Strikes, James Craven plays a scientist -- this time a Dr. Bryant -- who encounters a man from Mars who wants to take over the Earth. In Purple Monster Craven's mind and body were taken over by the title martian, but in this one Bryant is just a skunk who's willing to betray the Earth for, presumably, some power. The Martian, Mota (Gregory Gaye), flies about in a "semi-disc" and has some human thugs in his employ. The hero is Kent Fowler (Walter Reed) and the nominal heroine is pretty Lois Collier, who appears to be able to act (and shoot a gun) but isn't given much to do. Tom Steele and Ken Terrell have smaller roles. There are some good cliffhanger situations, such as one involving a fight and an explosion on a railroad trestle, and another concerning some rocket fuel that catches fire.

Okay, but Purple Monster was better. **1/2.

THE NAUGHTY NINETIES

THE NAUGHTY NINETIES (1945). Director: Jean Yarbrough.

Lou Costello is Sebastian Dimwiddle, a stage worker on a theatrical river boat, and Bud Abbott is romantic ham actor Dexter Broadhurst (however the boys' friendly/unfriendly relationship is the same as ever). The owner of the river boat, Capt. Sam (Henry Travers) comes afoul of a group of corrupt gamblers led by the serpentine Bonita Farrow (Rita Johnson). After a crooked card game Sam discovers that Bonita and her slimy pals own 75 % of the riverboat, and once on board they open a casino that fleeces all the customers. Naturally A&C do their best to get their captain out of the jam. The fellows do their "Who's on First?" routine, and there are other very amusing sequences. A note of black comedy is introduced in a scene when Sebastian thinks the cook is making hamburgers out of chopped up cats when he's really preparing catfish. When he sticks his fork in his hamburger, a cat under the table lets out a screech. Johnson is quite good as the lady ringleader, and Joe Sawyer, playing one of her henchmen, has a funny sleep-walking scene. Alan Curtis and Lois Collier round out the cast portraying, respectively, an associate of Bonita's and the riverboat's pretty singer, Caroline.

Verdict: Good-natured romp with some funny stuff in it. ***.

WEIRD WOMAN

WEIRD WOMAN (1944). Director: Reginald LeBorg.

Undoubtedly the best "Inner Sanctum" feature, this is the first film version of Frtiz Leiber's novel "Conjure Wife." Lon Chaney Jr. is a college professor who marries Paula (Anne Gwynne), much to the consternation of gal pal Ilona (Evelyn Ankers, in one of her best roles). When Chaney has one bit of good fortune after another, he discovers his wife is using witchcraft to ward off his enemies' influences. A disgusted Chaney destroys all of Paula's magic talismans -- and boy does his luck begin to change for the worse. This study of small town college jealousies and romantic rivalries with a supernatural twist is compelling and creepy, with good performances and a suspenseful climax. Chaney isn't bad (although his whispered utterances are as annoying as ever and he's not very credible as a romantic figure), and in addition to the above-named performances there is solid work from Elisabeth Risdon as the blunt Dean of Women, Ralph Morgan as a professor, Elizabeth Russell as his ambitious wife, Lois Collier as an amorous student, and Phil Brown as her jealous boyfriend. This was remade as Burn, Witch, Burn and again as a comic version, Witches' Brew.

Verdict: Quite good little B movie. ***.

JUNGLE WOMAN

JUNGLE WOMAN (1944). Director: Reginald LeBorg.

Paula the Ape Woman is back! Apparently there was a spark of life left in her at the end of Captive Wild Woman, and the kindly Dr. Fletcher (J. Carrol Naish) was able to resuscitate her. The gorilla-girl sort of spontaneously turns back into the beautiful Acquanetta and, now human, becomes a patient in Fletcher's sanitarium. The story is told mostly in flashback during a session of coroner's court; there are also flashbacks taken from the first picture. For the first time ever, Paula opens her mouth and speaks -- excitedly -- when she spots Bob (Richard David), the boyfriend of Fletcher's daughter, Joan (Lois Collier). Sure enough, her hormones have kicked in gear again and she'll kill off anyone who gets between her and her chosen mate! Uh oh! Milburn Stone and Evelyn Ankers appear in the court scene, but have nothing to do with the new storyline. According to Stone's testimony, Cheela the gorilla was rumored to be a human being who had been turned into an ape via experiments, an intriguing notion (the opposite of what occurred in Captive Wild Woman) that isn't examined any further. Acquanetta effectively lopes around with a kind of gorilla's gait, and the other performances are competent; Naish is as wonderful as ever. A night time underwater attack on a canoe is well-handled, and the picture, while utterly illogical at times, has a certain amount of suspense. Followed by The Jungle Captive.

Verdict: Fun! Paula would want you to watch it. **1/2.