BATMAN FOREVER

Jim Carrey and Tommy Lee Jones

BATMAN FOREVER (1995). Director: Joel Schumacher.

"Why can't you just die!" -- Two-Face.

Bruce Wayne (Val Kilmer of Kill Me Again), who is secretly Batman, has his hands full with the combined threat of former employee Edward Nygma (Jim Carrey), who has reinvented himself as the Riddler and marketed a mind-sapping "box" for public consumption, and former D.A. Harvey Dent (Tommy Lee Jones of Eyes of Laura Mars). now the notorious Two-Face. A further complication is the seductive psychiatrist Chase Meridian (Nicole Kidman of Birth), who gets excited by first Batman and then his wealthy alter ego. Batman Forever also introduces Dick Grayson (Chris O'Donnell), an acrobat whose family is killed by Two-Face and who becomes Robin. Kilmer is fine as the Gotham Knight, but the picture is pretty much stinked up by the campy approach personified by Jones and especially an over-the-top, epicene, and really irritating Carrey, who not only appears to be channeling Carol Burnett, but who seems determined to turn this in to a Dumb Jim Carrey Project at any cost -- Frank Gorshin was actually better in the role. Kidman is okay as a kind of kewpie doll shrink -- "I'll bring the wine, you bring your scarred psyche," she tells Batman --  and O'Donnell is more than okay as an older "boy" partner; he was actually 25 at the time. Michael Gough, as usual, makes an excellent Alfred. At times the movie is as silly as any episode of the old TV series and aside from some striking scenic design and a brief bit of excitement as the very end, has few redeeming features. The action sequences are not well-handled, Stephen Goldblatt's cinematography is too often murky and cluttered, and Elliot Goldenthal's musical score is effective but highly derivative. Followed by Batman and Robin.

Verdict: Seems like it's six hours long. **.

THE SAINT: A COMPLETE HISTORY

THE SAINT: A COMPLETE HISTORY IN PRINT, RADIO, FILM AND TELEVISION, 1928 - 1992. Burl Barer. McFarland; 1993.

The threat of a brand-new Saint film probably ignited the publication of this look at the venerable character down through the decades. Barer's exhaustive tome looks at the origins of the character, created by Leslie Charteris, along with a complete publication history of the Saint novels, stories, and reprints, as well as a rundown of each Saint film, the radio series (Vincent Price was one of the actors to portray the Saint), the TV series with Roger Moore and later Ian Ogilvy and others, not to mention The Saint comic books! Throughout the book it is made abundantly clear that Charteris' strangely moral if slightly shady character pretty much made the mold from which other, similar adventurers -- The Falcon, the Lone Wolf,  and many others -- were birthed. The Saint may not pre-date certain pulp characters of the 1920's, but these heroes were nothing like him in any case. The amazing thing about this very informative and entertaining book is that I'm, frankly, not the biggest Saint fan and have never read any of the novels, but I still found the volume very readable and interesting. There are lots of behind-the-scenes details, and Charteris' often acerbic estimations of the movie and TV scripts are amusing. Like all books of this nature written by enthusiastic and knowledgeable fans, it makes you anxious to hunt down the old novels and watch the Roger Moore TV series on Hulu. Alas, the new film version that was in the making when this book was published, finally came out four years later with Val Kilmer playing the part. It was a mediocre movie that didn't make much of a splash.

Verdict: Good show! ***1/2.

KILL ME AGAIN

Michael Madsen points gun at Val Kilmer

KILL ME AGAIN (1989). Director: John Dahl.

Jack Andrews (Val Kilmer) is a down-on-his-luck private eye who owes $10,000 gambling money to hoodlums. Into his office comes Fay Forrester (Joanne Whalley), who has just stolen thousands from a boyfriend, Vince (Michael Madsen), who ripped off the mob. Fay importunes Jack into helping her fake her own death so she can go on with her life without fear of reprisal, although she doesn't let Jack in on everything. Before long Jack is suspected of murder, Vince and the mob are both gunning for him, and Jack finds an unlikely ally -- or does he? At one point Fay tells Jack that her original estimate of him was that he was a loser, and despite certain developments, her first impressions are accurate, as the man seems completely inept as a private eye. There are attempts to create pathos with brief flashbacks showing how he failed to save a woman, his wife most likely, from drowning, but this comes to nothing. Kill Me Again is entertaining and well-acted -- Michael Madsen especially scores as the vicious and threatening Vince -- but all the plot turns can't disguise the fact  that this is lower case film noir.. Jack's methods for faking someone's death may have played in the 1940's, but they seem ridiculous in a movie from the 80's. John Gries is effective as Jack's doomed buddy, Alan, and Bibi Besch shows up briefly as Jack's secretary. Kilmer [The Saint] and Whalley [Shattered] were married at the time; she was then known as Joanne Whalley-Kilmer. She's not bad as the femme fatale but a little insufficient as a major sexpot.

Verdict: It plays, but you've seen this once too often. **1/2.

THE SAINT

THE SAINT (1997). Director: Philip Royce.

Simon Templar AKA the Saint (Val Kilmer), a man with many identities and faces, becomes embroiled in intrigue concerning a lady scientist, Emma (Elisabeth Shue), who has invented some kind of cold fusion device, and a corrupt Russian named Tretiak (Valery Nikoleyev), who heads a new party and wants this device. Or something like that. While Kilmer is likable and effective as the Saint, the film has no real style or panache, and it's easy to see why there weren't any sequels. Nikoleyev has a certain charm and flair as the villain of the piece, and Shue is fine as the nominal heroine (but now that she's taking assignments like Piranha 3D it will be hard to take her seriously). An anti-climactic finale doesn't help matters.

Verdict: Watch the old TV show instead. **1/2.

XIII [Thirteen]

XIII [Thirteen] (2008). NBC two-part four hour mini-series. Director: Duane Clark.

This is a Ludlumesque conspiracy story centering on the assassination of the country's first female president. The killer is identified as a man named Steven Rowland (Stephen Dorff), but Rowland has lost his memory after a fall out of a plane and what's more apparently he isn't even Steven Rowland. Although XIII never has the energy or intensity of 24, it's certainly reminiscent of that series with its white house intrigue and top level traitors who think they can make a better America. The climax has to do with a dirty bomb about to go off in Washington. A post script, in which more questions are raised but go unanswered, suggest that at one time there may have been plans to turn XIII into a series. Stephen Dorff is nearly as intense as Kiefer Sutherland and makes a compelling lead (he looks much better with the close-cropped hair and receding hair line than he does with the shaggy locks in the poster). Caterina Murino, Stephen McHattie, Lucinda Davis, Jonathan Higgins, and Mimi Kuzyk are also notable. Val Kilmer is top billed but doesn't show up that much as The Mongoose.

Verdict: Okay, but no 24. **1/2.