PENELOPE

Natalie Wood

PENELOPE (1966). Director: Arthur Hiller.

Penelope (Natalie Wood) is the neglected wife of a bank president, James Elcott (Ian Bannen of Psyche 59). Apparently she has had a problem with stealing -- which gives her pleasure -- for some years, but her crowning achievement, some might say, is robbing her husband's bank on the very day it opens. Two cops -- Lt. Bixbee (Peter Falk) and Sergeant Rothschild (Bill Gunn) -- are called in to investigate, and are quickly on the trail of a blond woman with a French accent who disguised herself as an old lady and changed her clothing and wig in the ladies room. The two cops get closer and closer to Penelope, but ultimately arrest a streetwalker named Honeysuckle Rose (Arlene Golonka). Will Penelope come clean and keep this innocent woman out of jail?

Penelope in old lady drag

Penelope has its amusing moments, but as a major comedy it's a bust. Natalie Wood is cute in the picture, but her character calls more for a kookie Gracie Allen-type -- even Phyllis Diller would have been better in some ways -- and Wood doesn't really have sharp comedic skills. Ian Bannen isn't especially funny, either, but although he's initially rather off-putting, his performance is acceptable. At first Dick Shawn as Penelope's psychiatrist doesn't exactly act as if he's in a comedy, but he has his moments as well. Lila Kedrova and Lou Jacobi enliven the film a bit with their portrayal of a couple who run a dress shop. Jonathan Winters is completely wasted in a terrible flashback wherein he plays Penelope's college professor who literally tries to rape her -- even back in 1966 this sequence must have seemed utterly tasteless.

Peter Falk

Yet Penelope never quite made it onto my Films I Just Couldn't Finish list. That's because the movie is generally watchable, moves fairly quickly, and has some interesting twists to it that keep you  involved. As for the other actors, Peter Falk is fine, although one could argue that he's auditioning for his role on Columbo. Bill Gunn is a likable African-American actor who does what he can with a small if sympathetic part. Norma Crane [Night Gallery] is zesty as Elcott's ex-girlfriend, who just won't let go, and Arlene Golanka [Diary of a Bachelor] really runs with her brief portrayal of Honeysuckle. If you don't blink you'll also see adept bits by Jerome Cowan and Fritz Feld. Wood didn't make another movie for three years after this flick bombed at the box office.  

Verdict:  If the biggest laugh comes from a character's burping, you know a comedy is in trouble. **1/2.                                                                                                                                                    

NIGHT GALLERY (1969)

Joan Crawford in a dramatic moment

NIGHT GALLERY (1969 telefilm). Hosted and scripted by Rod Serling. Directors: Boris Sagal; Steven Spielberg; Barry Shear.

Rod Serling's follow-up to The Twilight Zone was a new fantasy-horror series in which Serling introduced each episode from a gallery of paintings, each painting tied in to one of the night's stories. This telefilm was the pilot for the show, and featured three tales of the bizarre. In the first, "The Cemetery," Roddy McDowall murders his decrepit wealthy uncle (George Macready), then freaks out as he sees the old man apparently breaking out of his grave in stages in a painting that hangs on the wall -- is the corpse coming after him with murder on its mind? The manservant, Portifoy (Ossie Davis), figures in an amusing climax. In the second story, "Eyes," filthy rich Miss Menlo (Joan Crawford), who has been blind since birth, pays a poor fool (Tom Bosley) to give her his eyes for money even as her doctor (Barry Sullivan) tells her she'll only have sight for about eleven hours. The story is deliciously ironic if quite improbable. [This was one of Steven Spielberg's earliest assignments; Crawford thought he was the coffee boy!] The third tale, "The Escape Route," is a highly satisfying tale in which a Nazi war criminal (Richard Kiley) in South America dreams of finding peace from "persecution" [!] in a pastoral painting hanging in the local museum, but winds up in a much more fitting scenario. Serling has scripted some fine dialogue for the stories, and gotten some top-flight actors to give their all for the all-important pilot. Roddy McDowall and Ossie Davis both deliver the goods in the first segment; Crawford and Sullivan are terrific in the second [with solid support from Bosley]; and Kiley, in an unusual turn for him, is splendid as the Nazi Strobe, with Norma Crane making quite a positive impression as the contemptuous prostitute, Gretchen. Serling is as adept a host as ever and the three directors are on top of things.

Verdict: Easy to see why this went to series. ***.