ONCE UPON A MATTRESS (2005)

ONCE UPON A MATTRESS. Wonderful World of Disney. (2005 ABC telefilm.) Director: Kathleen Marshall. Teleplay: Janet Brownell; based on the Broadway musical. 

This is a delightful version of the Broadway musical starring Carol Burnett, who this time relinquishes the role of the princess to an excellent Tracy Ullman and essays the role of Queen Aggravain. Burnett falls back on some of her typical shtick at times, but otherwise is magnificent. The story, of course, is based on The Princess and the Pea. Aggravain is pathologically determined to prevent her son from marrying (it would undermine her power, for one thing) so she dreams up impossible tests for the female candidates to pass – or rather, fail. The latest hopeful is Princess Winnifred the Woebegone (Ullman) who eventually discovers that she is to prove her “sensitivity” as she sleeps by feeling a pea that has been placed beneath twenty mattresses. Complaints that the leads are too old miss the point that this situation has been going on for years and years and the prince is approaching middle-age, which makes the song during which his father the King explains the facts of life to him even funnier! (Besides, the prince is called Dauntless the Drab, not Harry the Hunk! In any case, it's the secondary love story of Lady Larkin and Harry that features a young, more traditionally attractive couple.) 

The cast of Once Upon a Mattress

Ullman may lack that certain endearing “homeliness” of Burnett and Sarah Jessica Parker, but she manages to make a very effective and amusing Winnifred. Denis O'Hare is splendid as the dorky but appealing prince, and Edward Hibbert as funny as ever as the Wizard. Zooey Deschanel and Matthew Morrison make a convincing Larkin and Harry. As the mostly mute King Tommy Smothers has little to say but he gets his character across admirably nevertheless. The songs – lyrics by Marshall Louis Barer and music by Mary Rodgers – are tuneful and pleasant and occasionally memorable. Rodgers' melodies are easy on the ears, and sometimes better, although none have that magical specialness of her famous father, Richard Rodgers', work. That said, "Happily Ever After" is a swell, jazzy number; "Shy" is a lot of fun; "In a Little While" is sweet; and "Sensitivity" is a riot. On the other hand, I could do without "I'm in Love with a Girl Named Fred." All of the songs are well-sung and well-orchestrated, with no attempt to turn them into generic pop tunes as often occurs. TV versions of Gypsy and South Pacific may not have been very good, but Once Upon a Mattress is a very happy surprise. Oddly, the DVD for this program was released only two days after it premiered on television. 

NOTE: Burnett played Winifred in two earlier versions of Mattress in 1964 and 1972. Once Upon a Mattress is now on Broadway (direct from a production at City Center's "Encores") with Sutton Foster in the lead role. I had completely forgotten about this version until I came across my review -- reposted here -- on an old website!

Verdict: If you can't get to Broadway ... ***1/2. 

THE INVADERS BOOK TIE-INS

THE INVADERS paperback tie-in novels.

There were a small number of paperback book tie-ins to the sixties Invaders TV show. The first book was published by Pyramid books in August 1967 and was written by Keith Laumer. The book does not follow the "origin" story of David Vincent as in the TV show. For one thing, Vincent is not an architect, but an engineer, and he doesn't see a spaceship until the end of the book. He learns about the aliens when they begin farming out pieces of a deadly weapon -- a disintegrator gun -- to various manufacturers. The aliens look alike, talk in an alien language, and have super-human strength -- none of which is from the TV show. [There is no mention of the "mutated fourth finger."] The gun takes up the first third of the book, while the second part deals with a crazy man who attends UFO meetings and tries to trap aliens-- he thinks Vincent is one of them -- in his trap-laden old mansion. The third section of the book has to do with a large meteor coming down which is actually the aliens, Vincent's attempts to get the brass to take it seriously, and a sergeant who came across a slimy alien in its original form after it dropped to Earth. The book is acceptable, not badly written, but not that memorable, and the changes from the show are a little disorienting.

The second Invaders paperback, also written by Keith Laumar, was entitled Enemies from Beyond, and was an improvement. The first story, "The Survivor," has Vincent checking into the story of a man who witnessed a huge explosion at sea, leading Vincent to investigate a possible underwater base for the aliens. "The Allies" has the invaders unleashing huge, deadly monsters that attack people, with Vincent and a young lady trying to survive their attacks in a sprawling abandoned hotel. "The Clairvoyant" has Vincent befriending an old man who can predict when the aliens will try to kill the former. "The Telescope" has Vincent discovering an alien installation on the moon. All good stories, generally well-told.

The third Invaders paperback Army of the Undead by Rafe Bernard, was a disappointment. In this David Vincent travels to Auto City where the aliens are taking over human beings in the car industry by entering their bodies at the very moment of death. [These deaths occur during auto accidents engineered by the aliens.] Bernard introduces some new concepts -- the aliens' use of telepathy, which Vincent has somehow tapped into -- and explores other aspects of their nature. But while all this is admirable, it's also a trifle confusing, and the basic plot and characters are not that interesting. The book is also talky and the pace drags. Vincent notices that the aliens take over male bodies, and sort of hypnotize women who are in a highly emotional state. The main alien force -- at least in this story -- turns out to be female.

Verdict: The Invaders **.
Enemies from Beyond **1/2.
Army of the Undead **.

V (2009)

V (2009 ABC-TV series -- ongoing). Created by Kenneth Johnson.

V was originally a mini-series and then an ongoing series in the 80's. This is a remake/updating of that original show.

V stands for "visitor," a technologically-advanced alien race that has come to Earth ostensibly to share its knowledge with us and to help humanity. Actually, the visitors, who resemble lizards beneath their human outer shell, are here to take over the planet, but first lull everyone into a false sense of security by doing good works for humans. Not everyone is fooled, however. Working together as a fifth column to overthrow the visitors are a group of humans and aliens who have come to cherish human emotions and despise their own race and their plans for the earth. These include a police officer, Erica (Elizabeth Mitchell), who, ironically, has been assigned to hunt down the fifth columnists; Ryan (Morris Chestnut), the Visitor in drop-dead handsome African-American form who has fallen in love with and impregnated a human; Father Travis (Scott Hylands); and Hobbes (Kyle Mesure), a bearded double-agent who seems to have no true allegiance to anyone. A reporter named Chad Decker (Scott Wolf) sits somewhere on the fence. Ryan's girlfriend Valerie (Lourdes Benedicto) has just given birth to a hybrid baby carried off by the visitors, and Erica's son Tyler (Logan Huffman) has fallen for an alien beauty named Lisa (Laura Vandevoort).

Lisa has developed human emotions, in sharp contrast to her mother, Anna (Morena Baccarin), who is the ruthless leader of the Visitors. Anna mates with a hunky visitor to create soldier aliens, and then devours the guy with her big, needle-like teeth [only seen when she transforms to her true self]. To further her own ends, she has some of her followers break her daughter's legs. What makes it all the more chilling is that Morena Baccarin, who is perfectly cast, is such a pretty, sweet-looking woman -- with a Cheshire cat grin. The actors are all quite good, but Baccarin's portrayal is the glue that holds it all together.

V hasn't quite become "must-see" television -- it certainly isn't as good as the 60's show The Invaders -- but it is an entertaining, suspenseful program with a lot of potential. It has been renewed for a second season and will be back in the fall of 2010. It should be relatively easy for new viewers to get in step with what's going on.

Verdict: Never trust a lizard. ***.

EASTWICK (2009)

EASTWICK (ABC TV series/2009).

Based on the film The Witches of Eastwick, this has three women in the same town encountering the mysterious Darryl Van Horne (Paul Gross, who starred in the TV show Due South about ten years ago), and discovering that they've suddenly become empowered with a kind of magic. The suspense of the series is not only what will happen to them with these new abilities -- and their new-found strength -- but if they will ever discover the true identity of the oddly likable Van Horne. By the time you read this Eastwick will most likely be off the air due to low ratings. While it has its entertaining moments and some good performances, it hasn't quite become a "must-see." Gross isn't bad, although at first he seemed to be trying too hard to imitate Jack Nicholson [who played the same role in the movie]. Lindsay Price ( a decade after The Bold and the Beautiful) and Jaime Ray Newman are fine as Jennifer and Kat, respectively, but Rebecca Romijn [Mystique in the X-Men movies] was probably not the best casting choice as Roxie. Sara Rue probably makes the best impression as Jennifer's friend, Penny. Veronica Cartwright, who also appeared in the theatrical film, is fun but hasn't much to do as the put-upon "Bun." A real problem with the series is that the very likable Jennifer and the weak-gal-seeking-strength Kat both became just a little too obnoxious, especially the former.

Verdict: It was here but now it's gone. Magic! **1/2.

HANK

HANK (2009 ABC TV show.) Director: James Burrows.

Kelsey Grammer stars in this new sitcom in which he plays a New York City executive who got laid off due to the economy and has moved back to Virginia with his wife and two children. One can't expect Grammer to play Frasier for the rest of his life, but one can't help but compare every other sitcom the actor does to that jewel he did a few years ago. Grammer is at his best playing sophisticated characters, not middle-class family men, and some of those old Frasier vaguely epicene mannerisms keep creeping in. Grammer is fine in Hank -- in fact, with all due respect to the other actors, he's basically the whole show. One pleasant enough episode had him encouraging his teenage daughter to go to work, and he of the big mouth wound up beside her selling ice cream in a shop with an obnoxious manager. Still, this had none of the bite or wit of the best -- or even the least -- of the Frasier episodes. I like Grammer but I can't see Hank sticking around for long. Someone should put Grammer in a more intelligent and sophisticated program -- Hank isn't it.

Verdict: Hurry up or this will be gone. **/2.

THE FORGOTTEN

THE FORGOTTEN ABC-TV series 2009.

The somewhat shaky premise of this show has a group of men and women, headed by an ex-cop whose own daughter disappeared, investigate John and Jane Does, trying to find out who they are, and -- with the help of a female detective -- figure out how they died and who, if anybody, killed them. This is in the same mold as Cold Case and Without a Trace, and is reasonably effective and entertaining. The members of the squad often go way out of bounds in their investigating, considering they aren't cops, and this has been dealt with on at least one episode. The trouble is, once the person has been identified, you would think their job is through, but they continue to interview suspects and the like as if they were cops [of course, what would the show be without a murder and its solution]. This is similar to the way the members of the CSI squad go far beyond their specialties on each episode. Christian Slater is the only recognizable face on The Forgotten, which is full of perfectly competent actors. So far the back stories of the regular characters haven't gotten in the way of the mysteries. Like the other shows mentioned, there's a certain amount of welcome pathos, such as in one episode about a shamefully forgotten football player. Time will tell if this will develop into a must-watch, but for now it's a creditable entry. Future episodes should probably not have the victims being identified too early in the show.

Verdict: Okay non-cop drama with distinct possibilities. **1/2.

PRIMETIME: THE OUTSIDERS -- ALIEN ABDUCTEES

PRIMETIME: THE OUTSIDERS -- ALIEN ABDUCTEES. Shown on ABC Television August 18th, 2009.

The very thin line these days between news and entertainment was practically obliterated by this special report on people who say they have not only seen alien spaceships but aliens themselves, and who have also been examined or even had sexual contact with visitors from other worlds. Juju Chang was the hostess for the program, and she wisely remained skeptical, although at times she might have asked some tougher questions of these delusional individuals. Admirably, the program brings in experts to explain about "sleep paralysis," a condition that affects many people, which makes them feel frozen and even have hallucinations, which most sensible people feel is the true explanation for feelings of being observed and experimented on by "aliens." Frankly, the people interviewed for this show all seem to have one thing in common: they don't seem very bright. One family man in particular is a geeky, unemployed guy who is gaining a certain measure of fame (among the stupid) because of his alleged "experiences" with aliens. Meanwhile this jerk is subjecting his kids to ridicule and probably giving them endless nightmares, afraid they'll be "abducted" any minute. [He's probably hoping for a book deal.] Alien abductees tend to be utterly average (or below average) individuals that few people would go out of their way to talk to at a cocktail party. Believing (as in some cases they actually do) that they are being singled out by aliens -- or, as one fellow feels, angels (!) -- makes these utterly mediocre individuals feel special. While Primetime probably shouldn't be giving these losers any attention, at least the program didn't take their stories at face value, and brought in experts to tell us what's really going on. As one Harvard psychologist put it -- and I paraphrase -- there may well be life on other worlds, and aliens may visit Earth someday, but these foolish people have not had any "close encounters."

Verdict: Okay for what it is. **1/2.

2009 OSCARS

2009 OSCARS Sunday February 22nd, 2009. 81st Annual Academy Awards.

Usually I find watching the boring, ad-choked Oscars about as appealing as getting root canal surgery. A friend of mine told me that tonight they were trying something completely different -- the Oscars would be presented as part of a story or film -- so we decided to give it a look see. The TV was turned on a bit early and let me tell you that 15 minutes of fawning "journalists" interviewing the "stars" as they arrived was more than enough. The Oscars began at 9PM but by 9:30 it seemed as if they'd already been on for an hour and a half. The ads, the introductions, the mostly tedious speeches as endless relatives and co-workers are thanked and thanked ...

Worse, the show was no different than it was in the past. Except for one thing: the deletion of clips. Yes, instead of showing clips from each nominated film and performance, past winners were presented on stage to tell each nominee how wonderful he or she was. It was at times maudlin and even insincere. But it also didn't make any sense. Does the Academy imagine that everyone has seen every film? Frankly, I've seen few of the nominated films and I would have loved to see clips of a few of the performances (and I've no doubt the actors feel the same way!). Didn't it occur to the Academy that some of the millions of people watching might see something they liked so much in one of the clips that they'd buy a movie theater ticket or DVD. I mean, isn't that what it's all about -- getting people into theaters? (The Oscars have less and less to do with art.)

Hugh Jackman made a pleasant and competent host, but his big "musicals are back" production number was pure kitsch. Some of the awards were duller than ditch water and should have been covered in a separate ceremony. I didn't think much of the songs that were nominated for "Best Song," although they had a good beat and instrumentation. I liked Best Actor Sean Penn's speech for the most part, and I especially liked the heart-felt speech given by Milk screenwriter Dustin Lance Black. I thought Queen Latifah did a nice job singing "I'll Be Seeing You" as photos of recently departed Hollywood folk flashed across the screen (you could hardly see the first, Cyd Charisse, however).

The Oscars were actually over by 11:55, which I didn't think would be possible.

Verdict: **. Not enough highlights-- and no clips!