MAME

Auntie Mame and Patrick on the Statue of Liberty!

MAME (1974). Director: Gene Saks.

The story of madcap Auntie Mame was turned into the musical Mame, starring Angela Lansbury. Although Lansbury, who could sing and had appeared in a great many movies, could certainly have essayed her screen equivalent, the role was instead given to Lucille Ball, who couldn't sing a lick. Remember the classic "Operetta" episode of I Love Lucy? When Ricky remarks that Lucy on occasion hits a flat note, Ethel reassures him that "every time she opens her mouth the entire cast will join in." If only they had followed that policy in this movie, because dear Lucy's croaking pretty much devastates all of her numbers. However, that being said, Mame is not a bad movie. Ball is not up to Russell's level, but she's hardly terrible as Mame Dennis, although the picture is completely stolen by Bea Arthur as Vera Charles (Coral Browne was great as Vera in the original, but she didn't steal the picture from Russell). "The Man in the Moon" is a funny number, as is "Bosom Buddies," and "My Best Girl" is a pretty tune. There are other good songs, but Lucy butchers all of them, except when Jane Connell repeats her Broadway role as Agnes Gooch and adroitly delivers her one big solo. [There's also a new song, "Loving You."] Kirby Furlong and Bruce Davison [Stolen: One Husband] are fine as the young and older Patrick, respectively, and Doria Cook-Nelson scores as Patrick's fiancee, Gloria, as does Patrick Labyorteaux as Mame's little grandson, Peter. Lucille Benson is funny as the mother of Robert Preston's Beauregard Burnside, who marries Mame and travels the world with her. The sub-text of the film substitutes racism for anti-Semitism. Say what you will about Mame, when the whole troupe breaks into the title tune the movie certainly plays. Jerry Herman did both music and lyrics, including the snappy "Open a New Window," an anthem to having new life experiences.

Verdict: Not in the league of Auntie Mame, but not bad on its own terms. *** out of 4.

STOLEN: ONE HUSBAND aka I WANT HIM BACK

Valerie Harper

STOLEN: ONE HUSBAND (aka I Want Him Back/1990 telefilm). Director: Catlin Adams.

"I don't want what's rightfully mine -- I want what's his!"

Martin Slade (Elliott Gould of Ocean's Thirteen), married for over twenty years to wife Katherine (Valerie Harper), enters into an affair with his daughter's mentor, Samantha (Brenda Bakke), who is much younger of course, and eventually asks Katherine for a divorce. Katherine at first seems to blame her daughter, Jennie (Julie Warner) and spends her time stuffing her face with junk food. Then she and her best friend Lisa (Brenda Vaccaro) begin a harassment campaign against Martin and Samantha, but this begins to backfire when she finds herself legally locked out of her house ... Stolen: One Husband is a very entertaining and quite well-acted (especially by the wonderful Harper) made-for-TV dramedy that explores the situation of middle-aged women who have been cast off by their husbands but still love them. The movie does enter the world of pure fantasy when Katherine is told by an attractive and personable cosmetic surgeon, Peter (Bruce Davison of X-Men), that not only does she not need surgery (which she doesn't), but even asks her out to dinner -- sure, that happens to cast-off wives all the time! Valentina Quinn is fun as Imelda, the housekeeper, and Paul Joseph McKenna has a nice bit as the sympathetic and romantically-inclined bartender, Joe. The main problem with the movie is that Martin treats both women in his life so horribly, never considering their feelings, that it's unlikely that Katherine would ever consider taking him back. The ending makes a good point about divorcees realizing that they don't have to make the husband the center of their existence.

Verdict: Watch out for younger bimbos! *** out of 4.

ALFRED HITCHCOCK PRESENTS 1985

ALFRED HITCHCOCK PRESENTS 1985.

In 1985 there was a new color edition of Alfred Hitchcock Presents which used Hitchcock's original introductions -- colorized -- for remakes of some classic episodes, although not always the episode they were originally used for. Later on the program featured some all-new material. The most memorable episodes were do-overs of "An Unlocked Window" [with Annette O'Toole and an excellent Bruce Davison]; "Final Escape" [starring Season Hubley in a lead role sex-switch]; Cornell Woolrich's "4 O'clock"; "Man on the Ledge" with Mark Hammill; and "Pen Pal" with a fine Jean Simmons in the role originally played by Katherine Squire. Many of the new episodes were pretty bad, but there were a few exceptions: "Twist," which had a lot of them in a tale of adultery and murder; "Kadinsky's Vault" with Eli Wallach as a book store owner with a secret; and the diabolical "Final Twist" with Martin Landau as the nasty boss of a fed-up special effects crew. I'm not certain if "The Impatient Patient" [with E. G. Marshall as a dying patient in a war with an overbearing hospital employee]; "Murder Party" [with David McCallum] or "Tragedy Tonight" [a woman's sister has acting exercises that lead to tragedy] were remakes or new material, but all of them were interesting. Some of the remakes were vastly inferior to the originals, such as "The Creeper;" and the all-time worst new episode featured a hapless Patrick Wayne in a dreadful spoof of North by Northwest.

Verdict: Too many unmemorable episodes to make this a classic, but not without interest. **1/2.