FILMS I JUST COULDN'T FINISH ROUND FIVE

FILMS I JUST COULDN'T FINISH ROUND FIVE. 

As noted previously, these are not reviews, per se, but notes on films that I watched or suffered through until I just gave up on them for one reason or another. Sometimes I skipped to different sections just to get a sense of what was going on or to see if the film became more entertaining. Not all of these pictures are necessarily bad, they just didn't hold my attention. If you see one on the list that you think deserves another look, let me know.

The Spider's Web (1960) is based on a play by Agatha Christie but I could hardly finish a quarter of it when I turned it off. Glynis Johns is irritating and the whole flick comes off as a witless sitcom. I couldn't care less who murdered the man found in a closet.  

FX-18 (1964) is a poor Eurospy film with Ken Clark of Attack of the Giant Leeches playing a womanizing agent sent to Majorca to smash a spy ring that operates out of a yacht. Clark is okay in the part but the picture's pace is too slow and there is no style whatsoever. 

Secret Agent FX-18 /aka The Exterminators/1965)-- not to be confused with the just plain FX-18 -- stars Richard Wyler as another Eurospy who deals with sinister Egyptian agents, a French rocket, assorted thugs and the like, but the picture never amounts to much in spite of a lot of running around in different locales. 

Fireball 500  (1966) teams Frankie Avalon and Fabian Forte as rival race car drivers with songs, giggling gals, romance, and the like thrown into the mix but after awhile you realize there really isn't much to this picture. 

The Spy with Ten Faces (1966) stars Paul Hubschmid ("Paul Christian" in The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms) as "UpperSeven," a super-spy who wears so many masks that his enemies don't really know what he looks like. This device, borrowed from old pulp stories and serials, might be the only really interesting element of this mediocre eurospy flick, directed by super-hack Alberto De Martino. Although Hubschmid is fine in the lead and there are some good scenes, this is not a contender. 

I gave up on The Man from O.R.G.Y.  (1970) rather quickly, although I did try to stick it out for my customary quarter of the running time. This stars Robert Walker (Jr.) as a weird agent for a sex-based organization called O.R.G.Y. Walker is assigned to find three young heiresses who have a strange tattoo and gets involved in ludicrous, allegedly kinky scenarios. A complete waste of celluloid. 

I had wanted to see the strangely-titled Who Is Harry Kellerman and Why Is He Saying Those Terrible Things about Me?  (1971) for decades but was sorry when I did. With a poor and silly script by Herb Gardner, and an off-putting style from director Ulu Grosbard, this movie about a singer (Dustin Hoffman) who is supposedly bedeviled by a person saying bad things about him to his friends, never becomes remotely compelling. Leading Lady Barbara Harris shows up very late in the film but although she was inexplicably nominated for a supporting actress Oscar for this stinker, she's hardly enough to save this mess. 

The Sender (1982) is about a strange young man who tries to drown himself and winds up in a mental hospital where a woman tries to treat him despite his odd, almost supernatural, abilities. Despite the presence of Shirley Knight and the talented Zeljko Ivanek in his first starring role, this movie is so slowww and dull that I gave up on it halfway through. 

Fatal Instinct (1993) was meant to be a spoof of Fatal Attraction and Basic Instinct, and I must say Armand Assante, Kate Nelligan, and Sean Young are right on-target in their performances, but this is basically a Carol Burnett Show spoof stretched out to over an hour and a half  -- after awhile this Carl Reiner-directed comedy begins to wear very thin. 

The Nurse (1997) stars Lisa Zane as a woman who comes to care for a paralyzed man she feels is responsible for the death of her father. No one in the movie seems to realize how awful the situation is for the patient, who can't move or speak but is able to think constantly about his horrible predicament. Eventually this whole situation becomes irritating, but in any case the movie doesn't grip.

The Woods (2006) has a young lady being sent to an exclusive girls' school where she has to contend with bitchy classmates, weird teachers, and the possibility of witches in the woods. This horror film may have been intended for a teen audience, but it just didn't hold the interest of this adult viewer. 

Triangle (2009) features a young woman with an autistic son who goes on a yachting party with a guy she's dating and his friends. They wind up on a deserted ocean liner where someone appears to be killing them off. Instead of a linear and tense suspense film, which this could easily have been, writer-director Christopher Smith gets metaphysical, silly, and unoriginal -- and creates a mess, The movie is professionally shot, acted, and directed -- quite well made, in fact -- but seeing the same scenes from multiple points of view quickly becomes tedious. The movie attempts to add some depth and poignancy relating to the little boy, but the screenplay is awkward, and all told, poor. After an hour I skipped to the end.

Nerve (2013) concerns a man who learns his wife is having an affair shortly before she is killed in a car crash. He becomes friends with a hooker and visits his psychiatrist regularly after having a nervous breakdown. I gave this alleged thriller more than twenty dull minutes waiting for something of interest to happen, but the placid style and slow pacing was so off-putting that I found myself longing to switch to anything, even an umpteenth rerun of Dr. Phil. I skipped ahead to see what the "alleged" twist was all about and am glad I didn't waste another full hour actually sitting through this.

The Last Days on Mars (2013) has astronauts planning to leave the "red planet" when they come across some kind of dangerous contagion. When the actors began foaming at the mouth and attacking everyone like something out of Night of the Living Dead I figured this was another trip to the well I didn't need and switched it off. 

78/52 Hitchcock's Shower Scene (2017) is a documentary about Psycho, especially the famous shower murder sequence. Well after about fifteen minutes I gave up on this. I mean, there was some pretentious film journalist babbling on about the movie along with minor celebrities like Elijah Wood and Bret Easton Ellis offering their opinions and whose observations were neither insightful nor interesting  -- who cares? 

Normally I love monster movies but I quit Rampage (2018), despite some good FX work, about a quarter of the way in because it came off like just another "Rock/Duane Johnson" action movie that I felt I had seen once too often. Just had no great desire to see it to the end. 

Although I did like Inglourious Basterds (with reservations), I still don't count myself among the fans of Quentin Tarantino. Nevertheless I checked out Once Upon a Time ... in Hollywood  (2019) because people I know and whose opinions I generally trust recommended the film, so I gave this tedious and meandering movie a try. Everyone said that the ending was a knock out, and that may be the case, but I just couldn't stick around until it got there -- there were too many other films I really wanted to look it. I may return to this some day, but for now ... Besides, even if the ending is good that may not justify how long it takes to arrive there. 

Other pictures I stopped watching or skimmed through include: I'm From Arkansas with Bruce Bennett; Carnival Lady (1933); and the "eurospy" pictures Red Dragon with Stewart Granger; Secret Agent Fireball with Ray Danton; Agent OO3: Operation Atlantis with John Ericson; Dick Smart 2.007 with Richard Wyler;, The Big Blackout; Kommissar X: Death Trip; and Kommissar X: Operation Pakistan.

THE SLASHER MOVIE BOOK

THE SLASHER MOVIE BOOK. J. A. Kerswell. Chicago Review Press; 2010.

This thick, heavily illustrated trade paperback looks at the slasher film genre: Friday the 13th, Freddy Krueger, Halloween, Jamie Lee Curtis, and so on. There are chapters on pre-Psycho horror movies; Italian giallo films; German-made multiple murder films based on novels by Edgar Wallace; British and American Gothic films; "The Golden Age of the Slasher" from 1978 to 1984; and slasher films from other countries in the eighties, nineties, and afterward. In addition to notes on the usual suspects, I came across quite a few movies I had never seen or heard of before. I didn't agree with everything in the book, of course. For instance, Kerswell writes of Psycho: "Equating transvestism with mental illness seems to date the film," but the sequence with the psychiatrist at the end goes to pains to make it clear that Norman Bates was not a true transvestite. But The Slasher Movie Book is more concerned with the later slasher outcrop than anything else, and does as good a job as anyone of knowledgeably surveying the scene. The book is chock-full of movie stills and posters.

Verdict: If you dig this sub-genre, the book is engaging and interesting, if a little gross,  to look at. ***.

ALFRED HITCHCOCK PRESENTS: AN ILLUSTRATED GUIDE TO THE TEN-YEAR TELEVISION CAREER OF THE MASTER OF SUSPENSE

ALFRED HITCHCOCK PRESENTS: AN ILLUSTRATED GUIDE TO THE TEN-YEAR TELEVISION CAREER OF THE MASTER OF SUSPENSE. John McCarty and Brian Kelleher. Foreword by Robert Bloch. St Martin's Press; 1985.

This book looks at the great Hitchcock's television career, including Alfred Hitchcock Presents, The Alfred Hitchcock Hour, and Suspicion, many of whose episodes were directed by the Master and produced by his television company, Shamley. In addition to photos, the book lists every episode of Hitchcock's series, as well as the Suspicion episodes directed by Hitch, offering notes on some of the episodes. The opening chapter goes behind-the-scenes, relating how Hitch got into TV in the first place, the reactions of the sponsors [who Hitch regularly ripped during his introductions], the making of the black and white Psycho with a television crew etc.. Interesting and amusing foreword by Robert Bloch, who not only wrote the novel Psycho was based on, but many of the adapted stories and scripts for the TV show. This may not have as much info as The Alfred Hitchcock Presents Companion but it's definitely been proofread.

Verdict: An excellent reference source on a very popular and memorable show. ***.

THE ALFRED HITCHCOCK PRESENTS COMPANION

THE ALFRED HITCHCOCK PRESENTS COMPANION. Martin Grams, Jr. and Patrik Wikstrom. OTR Publishing; 2001.

This is a thick entertaining, informative reference work that pertains to all things Hitchcock and television, but also has sections on Hitchcock's anthologies of mystery stories, other suspense shows of the period, Psycho and lots more. There is an entry for every single episode of Alfred Hitchcock Presents, The Alfred Hitchcock Hour, and the color remake Alfred Hitchcock Presents done in the 80's with cast and credits, production notes, plot synopses, and comments from cast members, director/actor Norman Lloyd, and other people who worked on the shows. There are lots of notes, interesting factoids, and a wealth of material for the Hitchcock-TV fan. Not to quibble, but the book, as good as it is, sometimes reads like a rough draft that was not only not proof-read, but wasn't even edited by the authors, let alone a copy editor. But while this is occasionally distracting, it doesn't really take away from the book's readability and value. I have to thank the authors for one thing. Thanks to them I'm finally getting to read Ethel Lina White's short story "An Unlocked Window," the basis for one of the best Hitchcock Hour episodes. [I mean, I even emailed the late author's agent in England to try to find a copy of this story, but Grams and Wikstrom provide the names of not one but two anthologies it appears in -- which the agent apparently wasn't aware of!]

Verdict: Despite flaws and some awkward syntax, the book is a treasure trove of info and an obvious labor of love. ***1/2.

THE PSYCHO LEGACY

THE PSYCHO LEGACY Written, produced and directed by Victor Galluzo.

This is a fair-to-middling rather superficial documentary focusing on Psycho, its three sequels [the last of which was made-for-cable], and the amazing influence of Hitchcock's masterpiece. There are file interviews with the late Anthony Perkins and Janet Leigh, but most of the actors interviewed appeared in Psycho 2 and the later films and not in the original. Now it's one thing to interview Robert Loggia, Olivia Hussey, Henry Thomas, Tom Holland, etc. but quite another to include quotes from individuals whose sole connection to Psycho is that they have horror oriented web sites or directed some direct-to-video slasher features! One silly guy in a backwards baseball cap, who is presumably a friend of the documentary's producer, remarks how Norman Bates [in the later films] attracts women half his age and he therefore sometimes wishes he was Norman -- yeah, right. [This kind of nonsense only cheapens the whole tone of the project.] Also too much is made of this business about how people feel "sorry" for Norman. An unintentionally comical moment occurs when Tom Holland, who wrote the screenplay for Psycho 2, says "I thought it was a terrific script!" Nothing like blowing your own horn! Mick Garris, who directed Psycho:The Beginning, probably comes off best.

Verdict: Okay overview, but Hitch deserves better. **.

THE GIRL IN ALFRED HITCHCOCK'S SHOWER

THE GIRL IN ALFRED HITCHCOCK'S SHOWER. Robert Graysmith. Berkley Books; 2010.

Because of carelessness and the fact that she wasn't aware of what people were saying about her, Marli Renfro, the body double for Janet Leigh in the shower scene in Psycho, was reported murdered -- there was even a book about it. However it turns out the real victim was Myra Davis, a supposed stand-in for Leigh who did not take her clothes off and therefore did not "stand-in" in the shower. [People thought that "Marli Renfro" was Davis' stage name.] It was irresistible, of course: the body double in the shower in Psycho winds up being murdered by a psycho herself. Only it didn't really happen.

The Girl in Alfred Hitchcock's Shower purports to be a biography of the very-much-alive Marli Renfro, but author Graysmith doesn't seem to know if he wants to write a bio about a pin-up queen [with a great body but not a great beauty] that he idolized in college [time to grow up, maybe?]; a book about the making of Psycho; or a true-crime tome about "Sonny" Busch, who was strangling women around the time that Psycho was being made. And boy does this book suffer because of it!

Just as the story of Sonny Busch reaches fever pitch and you're anxious to know what happens next, Graysmith suddenly switches to a chapter about Renfro and her negligible "career" in men's magazines and in sex comedies. This happens again and again. You're anxious to find out how Sonny is going to get caught, and Graysmith expects you to give a shit about some old movie with Marli because Francis Ford Coppola was supposedly involved with it. Marli Renfro's life and career might have been worth an article, but a book? It's almost as if all the stuff about Hitchcock and Psycho and Sonny Busch on his murdering spree is padding for the life story of Marli Renfro! Who cares? The real story is Sonny Busch and his murder spree, but Graysmith keeps pulling away from it to concentrate on the tedious adventures of Marli, even dragging in Hugh Hefner and others for some added name-dropping. I suspect Graysmith was trying to create a book that was a big tapestry containing several elements, but it doesn't work -- the separate elements simply don't jell.

Worse, there seems to be only a couple of paragraphs about the actual murdered woman. We learn virtually nothing about her! The other victims are pretty much given short shrift as well.

While some parts of The Girl in Alfred Hitchcock's Shower are readable, the fact remains that this is a disjointed and ill-conceived project cobbled together for the 50th anniversary of Hitchcock's film. If Graysmith had wanted to write about Renfro and the world of men's magazines and cheap sex films of the sixties, he should have stuck to that. It seems to me that a book about Sonny Busch -- a psycho on the loose who even murdered two victims after seeing the film -- would have not only included the Psycho connection but made a far more interesting tome.

Verdict: Half of this book should have been left on the cutting room floor. **.

THE MOMENT OF PSYCHO

THE MOMENT OF PSYCHO: How Alfred Hitchcock Taught America to Love Murder. David Thomson. Basic Books; 2009.

In a long essay Thomson looks at Psycho scene by scene, examining the doors it opened in regards to censorship and sexuality and violence in film, and looks at how influential it has been on films in general, not just horror movies or thrillers. The book is padded a bit with brief looks at these other films and even a section on American highways. Frankly, although the book is well-written and has a few interesting things to say, much of it is already known and obvious; another problem is that Thomson drops in a somewhat intriguing observation or intimation and then drops it altogether half a page later. Why be coy in this day and age? Many ideas are simply not developed. This should have appeared as an article in a film magazine or maybeVanity Fair. Will even major Psycho fans want to spend nearly $23.00 on such a slender volume?

Verdict: At least it's a fast read. **1/2.

PSYCHO

PSYCHO (1960). Director: Alfred Hitchcock. 

 "I think that we're all in our private traps, clamped in them. And none of us can ever get out. We scratch and claw, but only at the air, only at each other. And for all of it, we never budge an inch." -- Norman Bates. "If you love someone, you don't do that to them even if you hate them" -- Norman Bates. 

You can quibble about Psycho's flaws, but let's talk about the virtues of this incredibly influential motion picture. Anthony Perkins gives an outstanding performance, and his scene when he's questioned by an equally wonderful Martin Balsam as the investigator Arbogast is practically a textbook example of great two-party acting. Janet Leigh has gone up in my estimation. Yes, she delivers some lines that are meant to be ironic in too matter-of-fact a style, but she's quite good in her nervous scenes with the cop and the used car salesman, not to mention Norman. Simon Oakland as the psychiatrist in the epilogue plays the guy as if he's a bit nutty and insensitive, but he makes what could have been a dull scene a lot more interesting. Vera Miles displays an effective intensity and even John Gavin is better than usual. Frank Albertson is great as the wealthy guy with the forty thousand who starts the whole horrific ball rolling. Even the very small roles are well cast. Joseph Stefano's screenplay is full of wonderful -- and occasionally wicked -- dialogue. [For instance when Janet Leigh's much plainer co-worker Caroline (Pat Hitchcock) says to her : "He was flirting with you -- I guess he must have noticed my wedding ring."] Bernard Herrmann's score is one of the finest ever composed for a motion picture, from the stabbing violins to the German romanticism (heard softly behind the opening hotel room scene) that underscores the doomed love affair between Marion and Sam. His music embellishes every scene, such as the long sequence when Norman cleans up after "mother's" murder and drives Marion's car into the swamp. John L. Russell's crisp black and white photography is of a very high order, as are the sets and art direction. The basic set of the old house and the motel is a wonderful juxtaposition of the Gothic and the modern. There's no sense in saying Psycho isn't Shakespeare; its brilliance is on a cinematic level. In general Hitchcock's direction is assured and masterful. Even when you already know every plot twist, the picture holds your attention. And then we have the fascinating Norman Bates, inspired by the real-life Ed Gein but with his own unique and formidable facets. 

Verdict: Still an absolute masterpiece. ****.