FALCON CREST Season 3

FALCON CREST Season 3. 1983. CBS-TV.

This nighttime soap opera continued to be very entertaining for its third season, and netted star Jane Wyman a well-deserved Emmy for her role of ruthless, if somewhat human, Angela Channing. This season introduced two new major characters, only one of whom would prove long-lasting: Cliff Robertson was brought in to play Chase Gioberti's cousin, Michael, and Laura Johnson was cast as Maggie Gioberti's younger trouble-making sister and ex-call girl, Terry. Many scenes were devoted to the [literal] trials and tribulations of Angela's daughter, Julia (Abby Dalton), both in and out of prison, and a battle over a race track that Richard Channing (David Selby) wants to build. The sinister secret organization, the Cartel, rears its ugly head and makes trouble for Richard and his new personal assistant, Pamela (Sarah Douglas), and there's an ugly custody battle for little Joseph, the son of Cole (Billy Moses) and Melissa (Ana Alicia). Although more "moral" than his half-brother Richard, Chase (Robert Foxworth) proves to be a bit priggish  and hypocritical, and at times almost as "it's my way or the highway" in his attitude as his Aunt Angela, while both he and Maggie (Susan Sullivan) develop serious health issues [all of which are dispensed with rather quickly]. Terry and Angela's likable if odd daughter Emma (Margaret Ladd) struggle for Michael's love, but it's really no contest. In other developments Angela's lawyer Philip (Mel Ferrer) has quite a few tricks up his sleeve, and handsome sheriff Dan Robbins (Joe Lambie) gets more to do than in previous seasons, as does Chao Li-Chi as Angela's very helpful manservant. There's skulduggery regarding the late Jacqueline Perrault's (Lana Turner) will and rather hateful background, and more intrigue surrounding Chase's doctor, played by Ron Rifkin of Alias. Other guest-stars include Pat Crowley as an anesthesiologist, Ken Tobey as a family court judge, Geoffrey Lewis as a boyfriend of Julia's, and Whit Bissell as a businessman who is threatened by the loathsome Lance (Lorenzo Lamas) during the custody hearing. The most hilarious scene has the nutty Julia going to confession [talk about the blind leading the blind!] and the most tiresome storyline has to do with a kidnapping late in the season. The performances are all pretty solid, with Robertson doing a good job as Michael, but Wyman as Angela definitely rules the roost. Dalton is okay delineating the twists and turns of her weird character, but ultimately she's just not that impressive.

Verdict: This soaper continues to be much fun. ***.

FALCON CREST SEASON 2

The cast of Falcon Crest

FALCON CREST Season Two. 

Jane Wyman is back as the ruthless matriarch and vineyard owner Angela Channing in the second season of the night-time serial Falcon Crest. This season introduces Richard Channing (David Selby), who is the illegitimate son of Angela's late husband, and who comes to the valley to pretty much get even with everyone, and take over a newspaper. Meanwhile there's some question as to the paternity of the child being carried by Melissa (Ana Alicia), who is married to Angela's grandson, Lance (Lorenzo Lamas), but who slept with Angela's nephew, Cole (Billy Moses). Cole's parents, Chase (Robert Foxworth) and Maggie (Susan Sullivan), develop problems after Cole is accused of murder and Maggie works on a screenplay with a Lothario producer played by Bradford Dillman. Lana Turner makes a few appearances as Chase's continental mother and old foe of Angela's, whose two daughters -- Julie (Abby Dalton) and Emma  (Margaret Ladd ) -- have serious issues of their own, while Chase's daughter, Vicki (Jamie Rose), gets involved with a married man played by Roy Thinnes [The Invaders]. Frankly, the first half of the season isn't as entertaining as season one, but it picks up in the second half when the gang seems to be stalked by a ruthless killer who wants to get rid of anyone who might uncover his or her identity [which does indeed turn out to be a shocking surprise]. Some of the revelations and character reversals during the season finale are kind of suspect and silly, but the cliffhanger is a classic of its kind. Wyman is marvelous, never descending into chewing the scenery [a la Joan Collins on Dynasty, albeit she did it entertainingly], and most of the other cast members are swell. Guest stars include E. G. Marshall in a fine turn as Richard's adopted father, Joanna Cassidy as an older woman who falls for Cole, and Anne Jeffreys as a married girlfriend of Angela's lawyer, Phillip (Mel Ferrer). During their arguments Chase often throws Maggie's turn as a screenwriter in her face -- you wish just once she'd remind him of how the entire family was uprooted so he could pursue his dream of owning a winery, so what's the problem if she wants to pursue her own dream of writing a screenplay? It's amusing the way Richard imagines he'll be accepted by Angela when he's her husband's bastard. Choa Li Chi (who plays the similarly named servant Choa Li-Chi) is given more to do this season.

Verdict: Occasionally ridiculous, but a well-mounted and generally absorbing soaper. ***

MEGA SHARK VS. GIANT OCTOPUS

MEGA SHARK VS. GIANT OCTOPUS (2009). Director: Jack Perez.

Oceanologist Emma MacNeil (Deborah Gibson), paleontologist Lamar Sanders (Sean Lawlor), scientist Dr. Shimada (Vic Chao), and smirking official-type Allan Baxter (Lorenzo Lamas) team up to stop the menace of two humongous prehistoric sea monsters: a shark of massive size and an octopus that's just as big. Typical of direct-to-video monster flicks that wind up on Syfy, this picture is a lot of talk, talk, talk and you hardly ever see the monsters (and they're none too impressive when you do). The group uses pheromones to attract the beasts to a specific area, and the two begin a lacklustre battle. Emma and Dr. Shimada have a romance. Oh, and there's a lot more talk. The cast is rather appealing in its way, but the monsters are a real let-down. A few years ago Lorenzo Lamas appeared as a panelist on a really dumb show where people were judged as to their sex appeal, and he got to tell guys who were much more attractive than he was that they "weren't hot." That was probably the nadir of Lamas' career until Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus came along.

Verdict: Watch It Came from Beneath the Sea instead. *.