JAIL BAIT

Steve Reeves and Lyle Talbot

JAIL BAIT (1954). Director: Edward D. Wood Jr.

"Stay here, he says. Where does he suppose I'd go dressed in this?" -- Loretta in a negligee.

Don Gregor (Clancy Malone), the son of a respected plastic surgeon, Dr. Gregor (Herbert Rawlinson of King of the Royal Mounted), is pulled into a box office robbery by his slimy buddy, Vic Brady (Timothy Farrell of Gun Girls). When Don shoots and kills a night watchman, his father convinces him to turn himself in, but not before he confronts Brady, with tragic results. Brady forces the doctor to make him a new face, but the doc has an ironic scheme in mind. Jail Bait, directed by the notorious Ed Wood, really isn't much worse than a lot of low-budget C movies, although one can't say it's directed with any flair. Apparently Wood couldn't afford an orchestra so the score is played entirely on guitar and is rarely appropriate. Homely Delores Fuller, who appeared in a number of Wood's pictures, is typically poor as Don's concerned sister, Marilyn, but Mona McKinnon is better as a witness to the robbery, as is Tedi Thurman as Brady's saucy moll, Loretta. At one point Loretta complains, "I don't like dead men cluttering up my place." When she sees others looking around her apartment, she asks "Does this place look cheap to you?" -- yes, it does. Lyle Talbot, who apparently would appear in just about anything, plays the Inspector on the case, and compared to some of the actors seems like Laurence Olivier. Despite his good looks and physique, Steve Reeves [Athena] makes little impression as Lt. Bob Lawrence, although he would go on to better things, more or less. Clancy Malone gives a rather good performance in this but it was his only movie. Rawlinson amassed nearly 400 credits! The climax of the film is surprisingly suspenseful and has a clever denouement, even if the business with the surgery is completely absurd. Oddly watchable -- once. A cheap TV-style production.

Verdict: Sadly. Wood made much worse movies. **1/2.

BLAKE OF SCOTLAND YARD (1937)

BLAKE OF SCOTLAND YARD (1937). 15 chapter Victory Serial. Director: Bob Hill.

Sir James Blake (Herbert Rawlinson) has invented a “death ray” that can change the course of history, and a masked villain known only as The Scorpion wants to get his hands on it, which he does, more than once [the machine doesn't look like it could successfully send out a radio signal let alone a vaporizer beam]. Ralph Byrd is actually the lead of this serial, cast as Jerry Sheehan, an associate of Blake's. Providing occasionally unwanted assistance are Blake's niece Hope (Joan Barclay) and her little brother Bobby (Dickie Jones). While it is understood that one often has to suspend disbelief while watching a cliffhanger serial, Blake of Scotland Yard asks a little too much of the viewer. Blake has come up with the greatest scientific achievement in decades, but there are no guards watching the death ray [except for one undercover man]? The Scorpion and his henchmen wander in and out and underneath Blake's estate, Mallow Hall, as if they own the place, but Blake still doesn't call in dozens of extra men. The Scorpion plants dynamite under the house and nearly blows it up; although his plot is foiled, Blake leaves the dynamite in the cellar where The Scorpion almost uses it again. How did Blake ever come to prominence in Scotland Yard? Connections? It certainly wasn't due to his intelligence!

Furthermore, no one in the serial – not even the title character – even bothers to attempt a British accent. The Scorpion is meant to be scary but only engenders titters as he wanders about all hunched over with a fake claw that is meant to resemble a scorpion's but looks more like a lobster's. His identity certainly proves to be no surprise. The little boy, Bobby, is cute enough, but he's also a little too precious and affected, overly earnest, and he's allowed to become part of the action way to often. The adults worry about him at times, but do little to protect him; while feisty and intelligent, he's still just a child. The main trouble with Blake of Scotland Yard is that under Hill's stodgy direction, it moves at a pace just slow enough to give the viewer time to be irritated by all these matters. There's no attempt to create atmosphere through lighting and shadows and even the underground scenes are over-lit. On the other hand, there's a lively fight scene wherein the heroes battle their way past some dangerous Apache dancers in the Parisian Cafe by furiously flinging circular serving trays at them. And Byrd and Barclay show their versatility [which the former was rarely if ever allowed to do] by impersonating a drunken older middle-class couple in a bar. There's also a startling shot of a man falling through a skylight and onto a bed, photographed from high above. Blake of Scotland Yard is not a great serial, but it does have a few exciting scenes and a fair amount of suspense at times. Herman Brix/Bruce Bennett has a small role as a Scorpion associate with an eye patch.

Verdict: Not great, but it has its moments. **1/2.