THE GIRL MOST LIKELY TO ...

Ugly Duckling: Stockard Channing

THE GIRL MOST LIKELY TO ... (1973 telefilm). Director: Lee Philips. Co-written by Joan Rivers.

Miriam Knight (Stockard Channing) is a bright, energetic young woman with a great sense of humor who has, unfortunately, committed the crime of being unattractive. She is cruelly taunted by men and women alike, but when a twist of fate offers her an opportunity to become good-looking, she uses her new appearance to take revenge on her tormentors. The Girl Most Likely To ... is a black comedy that greatly benefits from the performance of an excellent Channing [The Truth About Jane], who continued to show off her acting chops in role after role on screen and on stage later on. As the movie is played for laughs and is often quite funny, one can ignore the fact that Miriam becomes slightly sociopathic and doesn't seem to care about any innocents who may become embroiled in her schemes, but it's fun, frankly, to see her abusers get their just desserts and then some. Ed Asner [Gunn] is also terrific as a cop investigating the murders, and Susanne Zenor makes an impression as Miriam's roommate, who has a horrendous voice to go along with her bosomy blondness. Warren Berlinger, Fred Grandy, Ruth McDevitt, Larry Wilcox, and Joe Flynn, among others, also have nice turns in the pic. The film scores points for making trenchant observations about the dark side of human nature in a humorous fashion that never quite disguises the understandable bitterness underneath,. Director Lee Philips was also an actor [Peyton Place]; most of his acting and directorial assignments were for television.

Verdict: The worm turns ... ***.

THE BOSS

THE BOSS (1956). Director: Byron Haskin.

Matt Brady (John Payne) comes back from WW1, and has a love-hate relationship with his older brother, Tim (Roy Roberts of Oh, Susannah!). Driving away his girlfriend, Elsie (Doe Avedon) with his drunken behavior, Matt impulsively marries a sad barfly named Lorry (Gloria McGhee), while his best friend, Bob (William Bishop of Harriet Craig), marries Elsie. After Tim's death, Matt rises as a crooked political boss with the aid of Bob, who's become a lawyer. A reformer named Millard (Rhys Williams) represents a problem to Brady, even as his ill-advised marriage to Lorry proceeds on its dismal course. John Payne gives perhaps the best performance of his career as the bitter, unpleasant, unhappy if powerful Brady, and there are also fine performances from McGhee, Bishop, and Roberts, as well as from Robin Morse as gangster Johnny Mazia, and William Phipps [Five] as the killer, Stitch. Percy Helton and Joe Flynn have smaller roles. One of the best scenes is a massacre of hoods in Union Station. Albert Glassers' score is also effective. Neither Gloria McGhee (also spelled McGehee) or Doe Avedon amassed too many credits.

Verdict: Payne makes his mark in an absorbing crime drama. ***.

THE STEEL JUNGLE

Perry Lopez and Kenneth Tobey

THE STEEL JUNGLE (1956). Director: Walter Doniger.

Ed Novak (Perry Lopez) is a cocky hothead and bookie who, after being arrested, is told if he tells all he knows about the operations of Steve Madden (Ted de Corsia) he''ll get a greatly reduced sentence. Loyal to the undeserving Madden, he refuses, much to the heartbreak of his wife, Frances (Beverly Garland), who doesn't care about the fur coats he gives her and hopes he'll get an honest job after serving his time. Madden is also in jail and Ed tries to ingratiate himself with the mob boss, who comes to like him. Ed witnesses the murder of a guard which Madden was responsible for and still refuses to talk, leading to serious complications and an unexpected kidnapping ... Lopez gives a good lead performance in this, which also boasts fine work from Garland, Walter Abel [Mirage] as the no-nonsense warden, and Kenneth Tobey as a sympathetic if somewhat sappy prison shrink. Allison Hayes has a small role  [playing a "Mrs. Archer" as she later would in her classic Attack of the 50 Foot Woman] as a neighbor of Novak's who has some information; Joe Flynn [McHale's Navy] is a prisoner; and Malcolm Atterbury plays a chatty mailman. Gregory Walcott of Plan 9 from Outer Space plays the guard, Weaver. The Steel Jungle is an acceptable prison melodrama with some effective performances. Lopez had a long list of credits.

Verdict: Reasonably engaging potboiler. **1/2.

INDESTRUCTIBLE MAN

INDESTRUCTIBLE MAN (1956). Director: Jack Pollexfen.

Charles "Butcher" Benton (Lon Chaney Jr.) isn't having a very good day. Arrested for a payroll robbery and murder, his two partners in the crime roll over on him and his own lawyer is the mastermind of the plot. However, things look up after he's executed, when his body is delivered to a scientist, Professor Bradshaw (Robert Shayne), who is trying to find a cure for cancer. For some reason Bradshaw treats Benton's corpse to an electrical process that inadvertently brings the dead man back to life -- mute. With super-strength and invulnerability to bullets and what-not, Benton proceeds to go after the ones who done him wrong. Max Showalter is the detective on the case, and Ross Elliott is the Lawyer, Paul Lowe. Ken Terrell, who played butler Jess in Attack of the 50 Foot Woman, is one of Benton's victims. The cast is professional enough, and Chaney -- although he only speaks in the opening sequence -- gives one of his better, more intense performances. Marian Carr is very appealing as the dancer, Eva Martin, who once befriended Benton; she was also in Kiss Me Deadly. Marjorie Stapp makes an impression as a woman whose boyfriend is murdered by Benton right in front of her. (She was also in The Monster that Challeneged the World -- as was Showalter -- Daughter of Dr. Jekyll, and other genre films.) Joe Flynn of McHale's Navy has a small role as Shayne's assistant. Elliott was a busy actor of the period and appeared in The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms. Albert Glasser's dramatic score is a definite asset to the picture. The narration is unnecessary but there is a good use of locations. Exciting climax in the sewers.

Verdict: Entertaining, taut little thriller. ***.

THE STRONGEST MAN IN THE WORLD

THE STRONGEST MAN IN THE WORLD (1975). Director: Vincent McEveety.

Even a host of veteran comics and character actors can't save this Disney comedy that takes a workable premise -- a super-strength formula increases a rivalry between two cereal companies -- and beats it into the ground. Student Dexter Riley (Kurt Russell) is the first one to inadvertently ingest the formula, but the Dean (Joe Flynn) demonstrates its efficacy to a cereal board presided over by no less than Eve Arden. Phil Silvers plays the head of the rival cereal company. It all leads to a weight-lifting competition which will supposedly prove which cereal is the best. Fritz Feld is a board member, Kathleen Freeman plays a cop, Mary Treen is the dean's secretary, and Cesar Romero is a hired crook -- all of them (and Silvers) deserved a better script. Flatly directed by McEveety. A few amusing bits but not enough to sustain a feature. Michael McGreevey is the kid who supposedly invented the formula.

Verdict: A waste of a great cast.