PRIZZI'S HONOR

Jack Nicholson and Kathleen Turner

PRIZZI'S HONOR (1985). Director: John Huston. 

Hitman Charlie Partanna (Jack Nicholson), who used to be engaged to the disgraced Maerose Prizzi (Anjelica Huston of Crimes and Misdemeanors), meets and becomes instantly smitten with Irene Walker (Kathleen Turner) at a wedding. The two fall in love and get married, even after Charlie finds out Irene has a husband whom Charlie murders. Irene is hiding a deadly secret, and it isn't long before both husband and wife are being told by different factions to off the other. Now the question is: will they actually be able to murder their own spouse, and which one of them will get it first?

Anjelica Huston and Nicholson

Prizzi's Honor is a black comedy that hasn't worn well with time, although I think it was quite over-rated, even by me, when it was first released. Nowadays there are far too many movies with rather loathsome "heroes" or anti-heroes that we're supposed to care about, even though in real life most of us would do our best to avoid them. The innocent victims in the movie are shunted aside as if they had no importance, which they don't in the world of the Prizzi's and their associates. If this film, based on Richard Condon's novel, is meant to be an indictment of these sleazy people, it doesn't come off that way -- it just doesn't have that much on its mind.

Stealing the movie: Lee Richardson

Nicholson and Turner are okay in the leads playing impossible parts. Although Huston won a supporting Oscar, which she didn't really deserve, she's not that memorable. (I thought she was terrific on Smash, however.) The supporting cast of more experienced actors is much better, with Lee Richardson [The Fly II] taking top honors and John Randolph [Seconds] a close second. The best I can say about William Hickey as Huston's vengeance-filled grandfather is that he's quite odd, and I liked him better in his appearances as the crazy and annoying old man on episodes of Wings. 

Verdict: One of those movies that makes you wonder what you ever saw in it. Still, it is entertaining. **3/4.

WOLF

All smirks: Jack Nicholson

WOLF (1994). Director: Mike Nichols. 

Embattled editor Will Randall (Jack Nicholson) is bitten by a wolf in Vermont, and finds that the canine influence is changing him into a new man. Instead of meekly accepting his being (essentially) fired by new boss Raymond Alden (Christopher Plummer of Dracula 2000), Will comes up with a plan to get his job back and fire his former protege and now rival, Stewart Swinton (James Spader of Jack's Back). Stewart is stabbing Will in the back in other ways as well. After Will separates from his wife, Charlotte (Kate Nelligan), he begins a weird relationship with Alden's daughter, Laura (Michelle Pfeiffer of Cheri), but he confides in her that strange things have been happening to him. His vision and hearing have become incredibly acute, and he is afraid he is going out at night and committing violent acts. Then he learns that someone close to him has had her throat torn out ...

Michelle Pfeiffer

Director Nichols and star Nicholson collaborated on several movies, but one wishes they had skipped this one, as the two main problems with Wolf are its director and its star. By now Nicholson had almost become a glib caricature of himself, and his smirking performance in this really isn't very good -- other actors could have done so much more with this often very emotional material. (Oddly, Nicholson wanted to do this movie and signed on first, bringing in Nichols later -- why didn't he take it more seriously?) Pfeiffer is also miscast, as she doesn't get across whatever there is in her nature that would attract her to Will (aside from that canine energy raging inside him), and their romance -- if that's what you can call it -- is never for a moment believable. James Spader and Christopher Plummer give the best performances of the lead cast members.

James Spader

It's almost as if Nichols was afraid to make a "mere" horror movie, so he doesn't pull out all the stops and the film suffers because of it. He is generally not very adept at crafting action sequences. The term "werewolf" is never used, and you keep expecting someone to bring up The Wolfman, but no one ever does, even though everyone in the audience is thinking it. The sub-text, what there is of it, isn't strong enough to turn this into something that "transcends the genre," as they say. Rick Baker contributes some decent make ups, but there are no great transformation sequences as this is not -- heaven help us -- an "honest to goodness werewolf movie." If only it were. That being said, Wolf is still quite entertaining if instantly forgettable.

Verdict: Cry wolf! **3/4.                                                                                                         

MARS ATTACKS!

The Martian Ambassador

MARS ATTACKS! (1996). Director: Tim Burton. 

"They blew up Congress, ha, ha, ha!" -- Grandma.

President Dale (Jack Nicholson of The Fortune) and his military advisers, including hawkish General Decker (Rod Steiger) and General Casey (Paul Winfield), prepare to welcome Martian visitors, not certain if they are friend or foe. When the Martians open fire, initially it is all blamed on a miscommunication, but when the Martian ambassador and his envoys disintegrate all of Congress, it is clear they are up to no good! 

Jack Nicholson as the president

Mars Attacks! is based on a bunch of trading cards that were packaged with sheets of bubble gum, so with source material that looney you know you're not going to get anything that serious, especially not from Tim Burton. My opinion on this film has gone from liking it to hating it and back again -- it would be all too easy to tear it apart, as it is monumentally silly, and I'm not certain that the black comedy approach is the best idea when you're dealing with an alien invasion that will leave thousands dead. But I have to say this is not an unmitigated disaster like Burton's Dark Shadows, and good taste was never the filmmaker's strong point. 

In the Kennedy Room: Martin Short and Lisa Marie

There is a lot of funny stuff in the picture, especially the sexy, buxom alien visitor (Lisa Marie of We Are Still Here) who winds up in the White House in the--get this! -- Kennedy Room for a supposed assignation with the press secretary (Martin Short). Most of the actors -- the cast includes everyone from Glenn Close to singer Tom Jones -- play this stuff just the way it was intended, with the cast stand-outs being Nicholson (who plays two roles) and Steiger. The cinematography and FX work are excellent -- including a homage to Ray Harryhausen's flying saucers in Earth vs the Flying Saucers -- and there's an especially exciting sequence when a giant, Martian-controlled robot chases pell mell after Richie (Lukas Haas). It's nice that his elderly grandma (Sylvia Sidney) survives and even becomes a hero of sorts. There are occasional flashes of humanism, but mostly this is just weird fun. 

Verdict: Unless you're in a peculiar mood, you might prefer to watch The War of the Worlds, either version. **3/4. 

THE FORTUNE

Warren Beatty and Jack Nicholson

THE FORTUNE 

(1975). Director: Mike Nichols. 

In the 1920's Nicky Wilson (Warren Beatty) wants to marry heiress Freddie Bigard (Stockard Channing) for her money, but his divorce from his wife hasn't come through. He importunes zany buddy Oscar Sullivan (Jack Nicholson) to marry the lady so he won't get in trouble over the Mann Act, which prohibits moving a woman across a state line for "immoral purposes." The three set up housekeeping in a cottage where Nicky pretends to be Oscar's brother. The two men both vie for the charms of Freddie, but then decide they will have a better chance of getting her money if the woman is dead. The two dim-bulbs then hatch a plot ... 

Our "heroes" with Stockard Channing

Old-time screwball comedies, of which The Fortune is an imitation, often featured "heroes," such as Groucho Marx, who were reprobates and scallawags, decided con artists, but Nicky and Oscar are essentially sociopaths who have no hesitation in deciding to off the woman who loves them. Admittedly, Freddie can be shrill and overbearing, and might be considered an unsympathetic victim. A bigger problem is that director Mike Nichols again uses the long take approach, when comedies like these need expert cutting and pacing. A manic three-way fight sequence doesn't work at all. In spite of that, The Fortune is frequently amusing -- thanks to the performances, with Nicholson taking top honors -- and has at least one hilarious scene set on an airplane. While the film is farcical enough not to be offensive, it perhaps needed to be even more farcical. 

I suppose there are those who will argue that underneath the comical tone The Fortune is about cynical human nature, women who can't accept reality when it comes to their men, how relationships are instantly disposable when things go awry, and so on. But I think The Fortune doesn't really have that much on its mind. I shouldn't like the film at all, but I confess I found it quite entertaining. But, yes, it could have been a lot better. Stockard Channing gives it the Old College Try, but for better or worse this is the boys' show. 

Verdict: For once Nicholson is the character he plays instead of himself. ***. 

HEARTBURN

Jack Nicholson and Meryl Streep

HEARTBURN   (1986). Director: Mike Nichols. 

Food writer Rachel (Meryl Streep of Postcards from the Edge) and political columnist Mark (Jack Nicholson of Carnal Knowledge) get married, buy a house that needs a great deal of work, and eventually have a cute little daughter (played winningly by Streep's own daughter). Gossip at parties tends to revolve around which spouse is cheating, but Rachel -- who is pregnant again -- is shocked to discover that Mark is fooling around with a notorious Washington hostess. She is importuned to come back to Mark -- but do they really have a chance or should she face the fact that she may have married the wrong person?

Kevin Spacey 

Based on Nora Ephron's autobiographical novel, Heartburn has its amusing and poignant moments, and the acting is adequate -- Nicholson had already entered the familiar "Nicholson mode" by this time -- but director Mike Nichols favors overly long takes that throw off the pacing and actually make the film kind of tedious at times. Because this is based on Ephron's book -- she also wrote the screenplay -- we don't learn that much about husband Mark (the real-life Carl Bernstein) or whatever reasons he may have had for embarking upon affairs (not that some husbands necessarily need reasons). Steven Hill, Maureen Stapleton, and Stockard Channing have solid featured roles, but the supporting cast member who really stands out is a very young Kevin Spacey [Beyond the Sea] as a subway rider who later on robs Rachel's therapy group at gunpoint! 

Verdict: Carly Simon's music may be the best thing about the movie. **1/2. 

CARNAL KNOWLEDGE

Art Garfunkel and Candice Bergen

CARNAL KNOWLEDGE  (1971). Director: Mike Nichols. Screenplay by Jules Feiffer.

In college post-WW2, two friends, Jonathan (Jack Nicholson) and Sandy (Art Garfunkel), contemplate getting laid and what type of woman they'd like to wind up with. Sandy begins dating Susan (Candice Bergen), but so does Jonathan, sleeping with Susan behind his friend's back.

Ann-Margret and Jack Nicholson

Years go by. Although married, Sandy wants more excitement in the bedroom and hooks up with the more aggressive Cindy (Cynthia O'Neal). while Jonathan shacks up with Bobbie (Ann-Margret of State Fair), who -- a la Rosalind Russell in Picnic -- is almost desperate to get married. Things don't go smoothly with either relationship, but then Jonathan is a complete chauvinistic pig -- his truly disgusting nature becomes even more apparent by the end -- and Sandy, although apparently more "sensitive," isn't much better.

Best friends? Garfunkle and Nicholson

Carnal Knowledge was a popular and admired film in its day, probably due to its frankness, but it doesn't hold up well. It is an absorbing picture nevertheless because of the acting and because there's some suspense over what will happen to the characters. Bergen, Ann-Margret, and Garfunkel (so good you wished he did much more acting) are all excellent, and while Nicholson was already falling into that certain stock "Jack Nicholson" mode, his performance is also good. O'Neal and Rita Moreno are quite effective in smaller roles.

Triangle: Bergen, Garfunkel, with Nicholson in background

But one is left with the sensation that this screenplay was an old and unsatisfactory stage play dusted off by Jules Feiffer and turned into a movie by a compliant Mike Nichols working in a Woody Allen mode. The movie, deliberately paced and with long takes, is expertly shot by cinematographer Giuseppe Rotunno [Haunted Summer]. Some scenes, such as when Jonathan shows Sandy and his new girlfriend slides of all of the women he's screwed (Susan gets in there by "mistake"), are quite contrived. Mike Nichols also directed Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?

Verdict: Two pigs in a poke. **1/2.

MR. LUCKY (TV SERIES)

Ross Martin, Betty Garde, and John Vivyan

 MR. LUCKY television series.1959. Created by  Blake Edwards.

In this series, one of several created by Blake Edwards, Mr. Lucky (John Vivyan) -- with no first name -- operates a legal gambling ship outside the limit with his friend, associate and fellow adventurer Andamo (Ross Martin) -- which could be the fellow's first name or last. The boat is named the Fortuna, which means luck. Halfway through the first and only season of the show, Lucky decides to give up gambling and turn the Fortuna into an exclusive and very expensive private restaurant and night spot; oddly the scripts seemed somewhat better afterward and there was even more action. Pippa Scott was a semi-regular who played Lucky's girlfriend while Andamo played the field. Another character who appeared frequently was Lt. Rovaks, (Tim Brown), whose voice was so squeaky that he sounded like a cartoon character [maybe "Lucky Duck."] Mr. Lucky, frankly, was not one of the classic shows of television, nor was it one of Edwards' better or more successful series, but some of the generally mediocre episodes were somewhat more memorable than usual, with the best single episode being one wherein Lucky gets targeted by a hit woman played by Mari Blanchard. Another memorable episode has Jack Nicholson and Richard Chamberlain robbing the Fortuna and its customers at gunpoint. There were plenty of desperate, kooky or sinister females, as well as gangsters [one of whom is played by Lou Krugman, from the "Lucy Gets in Pictures" episode of I Love Lucy] and other reprobates. Despite the competent and often charming performances of the two leads -- although Vivyan was a borderline stiff -- the characters were shadowy and never quite came alive. Other guest-stars on the show included Betty Garde [that tough maid in a classic Honeymooners episode]; Grant Williams, Barbara Bain, Cyril Delevanti, Eleanor Audley, Lee Van Cleef, Nita Talbot, and Doris Singleton [Carolyn/Lillian Appleby on I Love Lucy] who's striking as an especially ruthless female with murder on her mind. Henry Mancini's music is nothing special. Ross Martin ["Death Ship" on The Twilight Zone] would have much more success with The Wild, Wild West a few years later.

Verdict: Stick with Mike Hammer with Darren McGavin.**

FLYING THROUGH HOLLYWOOD BY THE SEAT OF MY PANTS: SAM ARKOFF

FLYING THROUGH HOLLYWOOD BY THE SEAT OF MY PANTS. Sam Arkoff with Richard Trubo. Birch Lane Press; 1992.

Sam Arkoff of American International Pictures tells how the company was formed, relates behind-the-scenes details of some of its more famous movies [including I Was a Teenage Werewolf and the Roger Corman/Vincent Price Poe pictures], and looks at some of the famous actors and directors who got their start at AIP, such as Jack Nicholson and Francis Ford Coppola. AIP tapped into a huge audience that the majors were ignoring -- teenagers -- and [when that ran its course and even before] developed new genres, such as beach, hot rod and "blaxploitation" movies, that the major studios eventually copied. Like a wise old owl, Arkoff laments how the movie industry needlessly spends millions on [often terrible] movies and how stars' salaries have become hopelessly inflated, along with other cogent criticisms. Arkoff regrets AIP's merging with Filmways, and later quit that group to form Arkoff International Pictures. Author Trubo skillfully allows Arkoff's personality to come through, with the result that the book is not only informative and entertaining, but a darn good read as well.

Verdict: An insider's view of filmmaking, Hollywood and exploitation pictures. ***1/2.

ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST

Jack Nicholson and company

ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST (1975). Director: Milos Forman.

Author Ken Kesey reportedly hated this film version of his novel, which takes place in a state mental institution. McMurphy (Jack Nicholson), arrested for statutory rape, is sent from a work farm to the institution, but it is suspected that he is faking his alleged mental illness. McMurphy provides some inspiration and leadership for other inmates, and finds himself in a deadly tussle with head nurse Rachet (Louise Fletcher). The odd thing about the movie is how conventional it is in many ways, despite the lead character being an anti-hero (and despite some intelligence and good qualities he is basically a loser -- I mean look where he is!) Some of the sequences are dramatically dubious to say the least, and the movie comes off (deliberately, I believe) as more of a black comedy than a serious expose of conditions and attitudes in mental hospitals. Nicholson won an Oscar and is fine, although the role is not in any way out of his range. Louise Fletcher also won an Oscar and is excellent as the nurse, who is less evil than misguided. The film introduced Brad Dourif as young Billy, and he's been playing odd types in the movies ever since. Danny De Vito (who is only adequate) and Christopher Lloyd later wound up on Taxi, where their talents, especially the former's, were better utilized. William Redfield, Scatman Crothers, and especially Sydney Lassick are all quite good in important supporting roles. The movie presents women and black men, traditionally oppressed and victimized, in positions of authority over the exclusively Caucasian patients, but really does nothing with the premise, and the other female characters, such as hooker friends of McMurphy's, are presented basically as cartoons. Fletcher's next film was the ill-received Exorcist 2: The Heretic.

Verdict: At times quite arresting, but nothing really special here. **1/2.

MICHAEL DOUGLAS Marc Eliot

MICHAEL DOUGLAS A Biography. Marc Eliot. Crown Archetype; 2012.

Michael Douglas, son of movie star Kirk Douglas, was under a formidable shadow until he found success as a producer of One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest and later even bigger success as a major star of such films as Fatal Attraction, Basic Instinct and Wall Street. His father had coveted the role played by Jack Nicholson in Cuckoo and was not thrilled when his own son didn't give it to him [Michael was pressured by others] and the two had a rather distant relationship until a life-changing event had Kirk take stock of his life and come to realize what was truly important. This book provides an overview of Michael's career, his failed first marriage, relationship with son Cameron and his second marriage to Catherine Zeta-Jones, as well as his battle with throat cancer. Eliot seems to have had trouble getting interviews with true insiders, so this mostly comes off as a well-done cut-and-paste effort, but it's not without interest. Eliot also wrote a book on Cary Grant.

Verdict: Acceptable standard movie star biography. ***.

BATMAN (1989)

BATMAN (1989). Director: Tim Burton.

"I am the world's first fully-functioning homicidal artist." -- The Joker.

In Gotham City there are rumors of a bat-like creature preying on criminals. A mobster named Jack Napier (Jack Nicholson) falls into a vat of chemicals while battling this creature -- Batman (Michael Keaton) -- and turns into the grotesque Clown Prince of Crime, the Joker, who causes numerous deaths by poisoning various cosmetics and household supplies. Batman must then stop his nemesis from not only slaughtering thousands of Gothamites at a celebration, but must rescue his lady love, reporter Vicki Vale (Kim Basinger) from the Joker at a climax in a cathedral. Batman, whose human dramatics are awkwardly written and played, is more a campy black comedy than anything else, and is a bit slow and dull to boot. The movie is overlong and over-produced, although it gets points for its striking scenic design if little else. Keaton is miscast, and Nicholson walks off with the movie, although his psychotic Joker is never really scary. There are some moments that are dumber than anything in the old Batman serials. The climax, which may or may not have been intended as a homage to Vertigo's bell tower sequence, is stretched out to a tedious degree. Jack Palance and Michael Gough are good as hoodlum Grissom and Alfred the butler, respectively.

Verdict: All too typical of movies that pay more attention to production design and FX than they do to story and character. **.

THE LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS

THE LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS (1960). Director: Roger Corman. 

"What do you call that salad?" 

"Cesarean." 

Seymour Krelboin (Jonathan Haze) finds an unusual plant and brings it to his employer, Gravis Mushnick (Mel Welles), who owns a flower shop in Skid Row. The plant attracts many new customers, but when it begins to wilt Seymour discovers that the only thing that will keep it alive and healthy is human blood. Guess what happens ... Written by Charles B. Griffith of Attack of the Crab Monsters fame, this is inventive, amusing, and grotesque in equal measure. Haze and Welles are wonderful, as are the quirky Jackie Joseph as co-worker Audrey [for whom the plant is named], Myrtle Vail as Seymour's mother, Leola Wendoff as Mrs. Shiva, who loses relatives with alarming frequency, and Dick Miller as a customer who eats flowers for his health. In smaller roles are Jack Nicholson as masochistic dental patient Wilbur Force, John Shaner as the dentist, and Lynn Storey as Mrs. Hortense Feuchtwanger of the flower society, all of whom are marvelous. A great cast, a funny (if tasteless) script, speedy direction, and those human heads inside the flower buds -- what more could you ask for? 

Verdict: A classic of bad taste. ***.

THE DEPARTED

THE DEPARTED (2006). Directed by Martin Scorsese.

Whatever strings were pulled behind the scenes, Martin Scorsese managed to pull off a real con on both the critics and public, for this picture – almost universally, if sometimes reservedly, acclaimed – is decidedly mediocre despite an excellent premise [borrowed from a foreign film] and some exciting sequences. Basically the mobster Frank Costello – more on that name later – plants an admiring young man whom he helped early in life (Matt Damon) in the Boston police department while the latter follow suit by depositing a young undercover officer (Leonardo DiCaprio) in the Costello camp. Late in the picture – when at last the suspense kicks in to a degree – these two men try to ferret out the identity of the other, with the expected violent results. The main trouble with the film is that this is supposed to be a thriller but the eternally over-rated Scorsese has never been in the same league as Alfred Hitchcock. There is only one stand-out sequence involving the bad guys closing in on a building wherein superior officer Martin Sheen is meeting with his Man On the Inside and a somewhat startling, well-handled homicide ensues. Otherwise the film isn't really awful, just a bit dull and predictable and certainly devoid of the tense and brilliant touches that a Hitchcock could have delivered.

Another problem is the screenplay and its utterly one-dimensional characters. Some older viewers may be confused in the beginning, remembering the real-life mobster Frank Costello who reigned in the fifties and sixties and wondering why the characters use cell phones throughout the movie and even refer to recent events. Jack Nicholson's “Frank Costello” may have been inspired by the real Costello, but clearly he is a different and fictional person of the 21st century. The “good guys” of the film casually use such terms as “nigger” and “faggot” but the superficial screenplay never explores the inferiority complexes that make people use such discriminatory words in the first place. [Unlike television, this movie basically depicts police officers as all being the desensitized bigots of earlier decades.] Jack Nicholson gives a showy, entertaining performance, but it is essentially another variation of The Joker. The younger actors, yelling out curse words and throwing tantrums, give good performances, but all the tiresome macho posturing is the easiest kind of acting to do. Since there are no real nuances to their characters, the actors aren't able to add subtleties to their performances, assuming this is something they're even capable of. That being said, Mark Wahlberg is very effective as an especially obnoxious police officer and Martin Sheen and Alec Baldwin are as solid as ever. In the lead roles DiCaprio and Damon are impressive enough in their swagger but never quite overwhelmingly excellent.

Because of the rave reviews-- and then four Oscar wins -- people flocked to see The Departed. But I have no doubt many of them left the theater thinking that the latest episode of say, Law and Order: Special Victims Unit had a better story, more dimensional characters, and moved at a swifter and more slickly edited pace. Far from being “cutting edge,” Scorsese – and his adoring critics – are slightly out of date.

Verdict: They really don't make 'em like they used to. **.