ROUND UP OF NEW AND RECENT FILMS PART FOUR

Dr. Strange 

Here are some mini-reviews of films that are less than twenty-five years old:

Deadly Whispers (1995). Director: Bill Norton. An investigation ensues when young Kathy Acton (Heather Tom) goes missing, and suspicion falls upon her father (Tony Danza). There are several good performances in this fact-inspired telefilm, especially from Pamela Reed as the missing girl's mother -- she is outstanding. **1/2.

Lonely Hearts (2006). Writer/Director: Todd Robinson. This is the third version of a true story already told in The Honeymoon Killers and Deep Crimson, only the focus in this version is on two homicide detectives (well-played by John Travolta and James Gandolfino, especially the former) with their own issues who track down the  exploiters and killers of lonely women, Ray Fernandez (Jared Leto) and Martha Beck (Salma Hayek). Leto and Hayek make a sexy and deadly duo of sociopaths,but making them share attention with the cops harms the movie. **1/2. .

You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger (2010). Writer/director: Woody Allen. When Alfie (Anthony Hopkins) walks out on his ding-bat wife, Helena (Gemma Jones), and marries a hooker, his daughter develops her own marital problems with her writer-husband (Josh Brolin). Meanwhile an alleged psychic, Cristal (Pauline Collins), is telling Helena how everyone should live their lives (past and future). This is a very entertaining and very well-acted comedy-drama that just misses being really special. It's typical Woody Allen, with lots of infidelity and screwed-up relationships. One plot point, in which a character steals a dead man's manuscript and presents it to a publisher as his own, has been much better handled elsewhere. **1/2.

Margin Call (2011). Director: J. C. Chandor. In 2008, after the head of their risk department is fired, an investment firm discovers that they are heading for a financial disaster; arguments ensue as to exactly which path the company will take to survive. Top-notch acting from such players as Kevin Spacey, Jeremy Irons, Demi Moore, Zachary Quinto, Stanley Tucci, Paul Bettany and Simon Baker, among others, helps keep this suspenseful and riveting, although some may be disappointed at the lack of highly dramatic fireworks. ***.

Honeymoon (2014). Director: Leigh Janiak. A couple (Harry Treadaway of Penny Dreadful and Rose Leslie) go to a cabin on their honeymoon and strange things begin to happen. Are one of both of them having a psychotic breakdown; is another couple nearby causing problems; or is there something odd going on in the woods? The movie is very well-acted and suspenseful but much too slow, and the wind-up borders on the ludicrous because it ultimately makes little sense. Too bad, because it holds the attention for quite awhile. **.

Home Sweet Hell (2015). Director: Anthony Burns. The acting is splendid in a very black comedy in which a man (Patrick Wilson) with a domineering and sociopathic wife (Katherine Heigl) is importuned by her to murder his avaricious and dishonest mistress (Jordana Brewster). Jim Belushi also scores as Wilson's friend and employee, but the movie becomes increasingly over the top and rather ridiculous. **1/2.

The Accountant (2016). Director: Gavin O'Connor. Two Treasury agents try to track down a mysterious CPA (Ben Affleck) with a strange family history who runs his own business but seems to have a number of dangerous sidelines. The picture has interesting twists and turns but ultimately it becomes a little silly. The acting is good, with J. K. Simmons a stand-out. This probably would have worked better as a novel. **1/2.

Dr. Strange (2016). Director: Scott Derrickson. Marvel's "Sorcerer Supreme" reinvented for the movies retains the idea of an arrogant surgeon (Benedict Cumberbatch) who searches for meaning after he loses the medical use of his hands. Tilda Swinton makes her mark as "The Ancient One" (given a sex-change from the comics), Cumberbatch [Star Trek Into Darkness] is okay, and there are some fine special effects, especially a sequence in which Manhattan is seemingly turned topsy turvey during a battle. The depictions of other-dimensions are interesting but there's nothing as bizarre as what artist Steve Ditko came up with in the comic book. The whole project is just kind of blah. Stan Lee's cutesy cameos in these things are getting tiresome. **1/2.

Logan (2017). Director: James Mangold. This tremendously over-rated movie takes a last look at the character of Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) -- James Logan of the X-Men -- and his mentor, Professor Xavier (Patrick Stewart), while adding a little girl, possibly Logan's daughter, who runs around beheading people with her claws. Meant to be moving, Logan is instead kind of silly and so restricted by dumb popular tastes that even a certified X-Men fan like myself found it stupid and tedious. The actors, however, are excellent and deserve a better vehicle. **.

The Death and Life of Marsha P. Johnson (2017). Director: David France. This documentary follows Victoria Cruz of the Anti-Violence Project as she tries to investigate the death of transgender activist Marsha P. Johnson. Was she murdered, or did she simply fall through the literal cracks in the pier near where her body was found? The movie has no real answers. It also looks at the life of transgender activist Sylvia Rivera, who became good friends with Marsha after their initial rivalry. There was criticism of the film because it was made by a white, gay, non-transgender (cisgender) man, but the real problem is that it borders on the superficial. One suspects that despite the very real challenges and discrimination Johnson and Rivera had to face, they had self-destructive streaks that only added to their problems. Johnson and Rivera get points for helping homeless transgender youths of color, but their work as LGBT political activists has been somewhat exaggerated. **1/2.

The Beguiled (2017), Director: Sofia Coppola. This remake of the near-classic Clint Eastwood film mixes Colin Farrell, Nicole Kidman, and Kirsten Dunst but comes up short. The simple truth is that while Farrell is arguably a better actor than Eastwood -- and he's quite good in the film -- Kidman is no match for Geraldine Page nor Dunst for Elizabeth Hartman from the original. Both of those actresses provided neurotic emotional fireworks that the new ladies lack. Still, it's an entertaining picture but not nearly as good as the earlier version. **1/2.

Batman and Harley Quinn (2017). Director: Sam Liu. Batman and Nightwing team up with reformed villainess Harley Quinn to stop a plot by her old friend Poison Ivy and the Floronic Man. This is the nadir of DC comics animated features, a disgracefully awful, self-indulgent mess that even includes jokes about flatulence. The worst Batman project ever, everyone involved in this should hang their heads in shame. Written by Bruce Timm and Jim Krieg. Why does DC keep foisting the irritating and obnoxious Harley Quinn on everyone? 1/2*.

Bad Match (2017). Written and directed by David Chirchirillo. An Internet stud hits the sheets with the wrong woman, who turns out to have a screw loose, acting like she's his fiancee when they've only had a couple of "dates." Before long he winds up fired from his job and accused of downloading kiddie porn onto his computer. Most men in this situation would stay far, far away from this "psycho bitch" who could easily accuse him of rape if he were ever alone with her, but our hero is so stupid that he goes to her apartment twice -- and worse. The film is not badly acted and has some suspense and a couple of twists, but it lacks the strong characterization and impact that might have made it more memorable. This is a good illustration of the old adage "it isn't what happens to us but how we react to it." **1/2.

Batman vs. Two-Face (2017), Director: Rick Morales. This is another animated film that is inspired by the sixties Batman TV show and which employs the voices of Adam West (Batman), Burt Ward (Robin) and Julie Newmar (Catwoman). The dynamic duo's main adversary is Two-Face, who also works with Hugo Strange and at one point auctions off Batman's secret identity to such villains as Bookworm, Joker, Riddler, and Penguin. King Tut also appears. The film is "cute," but the highlight is the closing credits in which the entire cast dance the "Batusi." Aunt Harriet can really shake it! The well-animated picture is dedicated to the late Adam West.**1/2.

Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017). Director: Jon Watts. Marvel has rebooted the Spider-Man franchise by turning him back into a high school kid (in the comics he didn't have much to do with the Avengers until he was an adult). This makes the movie with its 15-year-old hero (an enthusiastic Tom Holland) seem even more like a Disney movie for kids. Scenes of the boy's high school life rapidly become tedious in this very overlong movie which is distinguished strictly by two scenes: a battle on the Staten Island ferry, and a climactic mid-air fight involving a plane and a crash landing at Coney Island. These sequences are fairly spectacular, but there aren't enough of them, and the film goes on for fifteen minutes after the climax! The new supposedly high-tech versions of Spider-foes The Vulture (Michael Keaton) and Shocker aren't half as striking as the originals. In this The Vulture is the father of Spider-Man's crush Liz, and is using stolen alien technology to make weapons. Jacob Batalon makes an impression as Spider-Man's friend, Ned. **.

X-MEN: DAYS OF FUTURE PAST

Michael Fassbender as Eric Lensheer aka Magneto

X-MEN: DAYS OF FUTURE PAST (2014). Director: Bryan Singer.

"So, you were always an asshole?" -- Logan referring to Erik.

Around 2027 mutants and their human supporters are besieged by robots known as Sentinels and the world is in a terrible state. To prevent this scenario from ever coming about, Logan (Hugh Jackman), is sent back in time -- or rather his mind is -- to inhabit his body in 1973. The plan is for Logan, with his knowledge of the future, to help Charles Xavier (James McAvoy of Victor Frankenstein) and Erik Lensherr (formerly known as Magneto, although he is not referred to as such in this movie) prevent shape-shifting Mystique (Jennifer Lawrence of American Hustle) from murdering the creator of the Sentinels, Dr. Bolivar Trask (Peter Dinklage). Logan's first task is to break Erik (Michael Fassbender) out of prison, where he has been shut away after allegedly murdering JFK (he claims he was actually trying to save him). But can these three men prevent an angry Mystique from bringing about the very future they fear? This movie is very loosely based on a classic storyline in the X-Men comic book, but it eliminates the Brotherhood (of Evil Mutants) and adds a tense climax wherein Magneto lifts up an entire stadium and places it around the White House. The movie makes other changes as well. Quicksilver (Evan Peters) is Russian in the comics, but in this he's American and can run as fast as DC Comic's Flash. Another big change is that in the comics Trask is of "normal" size whereas in the movie he's a "little person" -- what that's supposed to mean except perhaps for the indication that people who are different can still discriminate against other people who are different?  -- but the movie never explores his feelings in that regard. The performances throughout the film are excellent, with Fassbender taking top honors as Erik. Ian McKellan appears briefly as the older Magneto, a role he created on film, and he's fine, as is Patrick Stewart as the older Charles Xavier (although one can't quite see James McAvoy turning into Patrick Stewart no matter how many years have gone by). Nicholas Hoult [Jack the Giant Slayer] scores as Hank McCoy, better-known as the Beast, and there are what almost amount to cameos from Halle Berry (Storm) and other characters/actors from the earlier films. This has an interesting and moving conclusion, and a good score by John Ottman.

Verdict: Those X-Men just keep on comin'! ***.

X-MEN: APOCALYPSE

A Really Bad Guy: Apocalypse (Oscar Isaac)

X-MEN: APOCALYPSE (2016). Director: Bryan Singer.

In 1983 Erik Lensherr (Michael Fassbender), also known as Magneto, a mutant terrorist, has been leading a quiet life with his wife and daughter when his true identity is discovered and a confrontation with police leads to their deaths. Now his mind is in the perfect place for him to team up with En Sabur Nur (Oscar Isaac of Star Wars Part VII), the world's first mutant, born in 2500 A.D., and better-known as Apocalypse. Nur wants to remake the world over by demolishing human society, and Magneto -- at first -- is only too willing to help him. His former friend, Charles Xavier (James McAvoy) and even fellow terrorist Mystique (Jennifer Lawrence) are out to stop the two men and their mutant allies. The trouble with X-Men: Apocalypse -- the sixth X-Men movie (the 8th if you count the two Wolverine films released before this one) -- is that it suffers from over-familiarity and despite a somewhat impressive main villain, lacks a really strong story or sense of desperation. This is another prequel, with younger actors completely taking over from those cast in the first X-Men -- Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellan are nowhere to be found. The X-Men comic and its many spin-offs (Apocalypse actually first appeared in X-Factor) have been published for so many decades now that the movies have their own interpretation of the characters, hence Peter (Pietro) Maximoff --  apparently Magneto's son -- is no longer a brooding, unpleasant Russian but a hip teenage American, who (as in the last film) has been reinvented to be more like The Flash. The movie's most striking sequence has Flash -- I mean, Quicksilver (Evan Peters) -- rescuing all of the students from Xavier's mansion when it explodes. I don't recall Professor Xavier ever being able to stop time in its tracks the way he does in this movie. X-Men: Apocalypse isn't bad, but it does take a long time to get started, and despite some decent effects, the pace isn't great and the action scenes not that well delineated. Fassbender, who is quite good as the conflicted Erik, has emerged as the dynamic star of the X-Men movies. Hugh Jackman only appears briefly as Logan and was given three of his own films.

Verdict: Perhaps one trip to the well too many? **1/2.

PRISONERS

Jake Gyllenhaal and Hugh Jackman

PRISONERS (2013). Director: Dennis Villeneuve.

The young daughter of Keller Dover (Hugh Jackman of The Wolverine) and her friend disappear, and the main suspect is a geeky guy, Alex (Paul Dano), with a van and the mind of a ten-year-old. The police haven't found enough evidence to arrest Alex, so Keller and his friend, Franklin (Terrence Howard of Iron Man), whose daughter also disappeared, kidnap him in an attempt to get him to talk, a situation that leads to horrible torture that appalls Franklin and his wife (Viola Davis of Doubt) even as Keller reminds them of how their children are also suffering. There's also a priest (Len Cariou) who has a corpse in his basement, which may or may not figure in with the main case. Jake Gyllenhaal [Source Code] is the detective trying to figure out what Keller is up to, and Melissa Leo is Alex' horrified mother; both are quite good. Jackman offers an outstanding performance as the tormented, enraged and desperate father; he has a particularly good scene in tears in the police station. Prisoners is absorbing and thought-provoking, but the mentally deficient suspect is a cliche, and there are improbable moments, such as when cops don't call for back-up or ambulances. Still, it certainly holds the attention and has some powerful sequences.

Verdict: This probably won't work for everyone. ***.  

THE WOLVERINE

Logan struggles to stay on bullet train

THE WOLVERINE (2013). Director: James Mangold.

Logan, the mutant Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) from the X-Men, is determined to give up his violent ways after being forced to kill Jean Gray in X-Men: Last Stand. But this is a vow he has trouble keeping when he's summoned to Japan to say goodbye to a now-aged Japanese man, Yashida (Hal Yamanouchi) whose life he saved in Nagasaki during WW2. [Wolverine's healing factor keeps him forever young.] Yashida has studied mutants, and Wolverine in particular, and wants to steal away his immortality if he can. Wolverine is aided by a young lady with psychic powers named Yukio (Rita Fukushima) and tries to protect Yashida's grand-daughter, Mariko (Tao Okamoto), from attacks by the criminal organization, Yakuza, and a nasty lady mutant called Viper who has a literally poisonous tongue and can suck away men's life forces with a kiss. Late in the movie what appears at first to be a robot Silver Samurai shows up to engage Wolverine in battle. The Wolverine is a fairly standard action/super-hero movie with little new in it, and is not as good as the character's first solo feature nor such films as X-Men: First Class. It has one near-thrilling sequence when Logan has a battle with an assassin atop a speeding bullet train and the two engage in some nifty acrobatics while trying to kill one another, but the rest of the movie isn't on that level. There's a post-credit sequence wherein Magneto (Ian McKellen) and Professor X (Patrick Stewart) make an appearance [presumably leading into X-Men: Last Stand]. Jackman has nailed the character perfectly and turns in a very good performance, and the supporting cast, especially Svetlana Khodchenkova as Viper, are generally arresting.

Verdict: If you've seen one Wolverine, you've seen them all. **1/2.

THE PRESTIGE

                                                                                   
THE PRESTIGE (2006). Director: Christopher Nolan.

"Just because you're sleeping with him doesn't mean he trusts you."

Robert Angier (Hugh Jackman), aka the Great Danton, and Alfred Borden (Christian Bale) are rival magicians, both desperate to pull off the ultimate illusion and find out how the other does his tricks. While The Prestige has some fascinating and suspenseful elements, and is well-acted [especially by Michael Caine in a supporting part], Christopher Nolan tries a non-linear approach to the narrative that insures that that the viewer is almost continuously confused. Is this happening now, in the past, the day after tomorrow -- who knows? You may not like the picture enough to go for repeated viewings, but it's entertaining enough for a one-time looksee. David Bowie is a weird scientist type, and Scarlett Johansson and Rebecca Hall are the ladies in the magicians' lives. The movie goes in odd, almost supernatural or sci fi directions, but the approach actually limits the effectiveness of these ideas instead of taking full advantage of them. It's almost as if Nolan was afraid of making a genre picture. Still, it's certainly something different.

Verdict: Perhaps too strange for its own good. **1/2.

X2

X2 (aka X-Men 2; X2: X-Men United/2003). Director: Bryan Singer.

This sequel to X-Men is another winner. Seems a bad guy named Willam Stryker (Brian Cox) had a mutant son named Jason, and his experiences with him so embittered him that he now wants to wipe out all mutants. To do this he intends to use Professor Xavier (Patrick Stewart) and the professor's Cerebro machine (which detects mutants and connects Xavier to everyone's minds). Professor X is given God-like power in this, but his opposite number, Magneto (Ian McKellan) is along for the ride and then some. X2 has some terrific sequences: Magneto using the iron in a guard's bloodstream to make his escape from prison; Pyro's (Aaron Stanford) fiery assault; the X-Men's plane being pursued by missiles. Jean Gray (Famke Janssen), Roque (Anna Paquin), and Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) all get plenty of screen time, as does Alan Cummings, who is as good as the others as Nightcrawler/Kurt Wagner. The entire cast, including Shawn Ashmore as Iceman, play with conviction, and the direction, photography [Newton Thomas Sigel] and musical score [John Ottman] are of a high order.

Verdict: Exciting, amusing, and moving. ***1/2.

DECEPTION (2008)

DECEPTION (2008). Director: Marcel Langenegger.

"Are you free tonight?"

A somewhat shy and nerdy accountant named Jonathan (Ewan McGregor) is befriended by the more outgoing Wyatt (Hugh Jackman), who gets him onto a list of people who indulge in causal sex with no names mentioned and no questions asked. Jonathan falls for one of the ladies (Michelle Williams) he meets through this group, and finds that she is being used in a nefarious scheme by one of the other players. I won't say any more than that about the plot, but it has a couple of predictable twists and one that is completely unpredictable and extremely clever. Unfortunately, Langenegger is no Hitchcock, and while the film has gloss it hasn't much style and not quite enough suspense. The ending is completely ridiculous. A bigger problem is that the cast [at least when you compare them to Hitchcock's more notable players] is distinctly minor-league. Admittedly Jackman isn't herein playing a dynamic character like Wolverine, but he only seems adequate as the supposedly more charismatic Wyatt. Likewise, McGregor and Williams are competent but little more. The original ice princess Charlotte Rampling has a small role as one of the women Jonathan hooks up with and is -- surprisingly -- fine in a role that suits her.

Verdict: A passable diversion with some good scenes, but watch the 1946 Deception instead. **1/2.

X-MEN

X-MEN (2000). Director: Bryan Singer.

This is an excellent filmic realization of the long-running Marvel Comics series that first began publishing in 1963. A prologue shows us a young Polish boy, Eric Lensherr, being separated from his parents by Nazis, the stress of which makes him exhibit his amazing magnetic powers for the first time. Decades later this boy has become the evil mutant terrorist Magneto (Ian McKellen), opposed by his old friend Prof. Charles Xavier (Patrick Stewart), who has formed a school to teach mutants how to use their powers and to hopefully prevent a war between humans and [evil] mutants that might decimate the planet. Into this school come two new X-Men, the young Marie or "Rogue" (Anna Paquin) and the enigmatic Logan or "Wolverine" (Hugh Jackman), who knows little about his past. Magneto wants to use Rogue [who can absorb other people's energy and powers] in a plan to turn world leaders into artificial mutants, thus preventing the passage of a mutant registration act that might lead to dire consequences for all of these people who are "different." Caught up in this battle royal are X-Men Jean Grey (Famke Janssen), Cyclops (James Marsden), Storm (Halle Berry), and Magneto's allies Sabretooth (Tyler Mane), Mystique (Rebecca Romijn) and the Toad -- much improved from his comic version -- with his tremendously long and snapping tongue (Ray Park). Bruce Davison is Senator Kelly, who has introduced the bill and becomes a pawn between the two opposing groups. The highlight of X-Men is the climactic battle on Liberty Island and in and around the Statue of Liberty. The film is very good at getting across the sheer effort that it takes these heroes to use their powers [they are not all-powerful like Superman]. The music, the special effects, the solid direction and acting [especially from Stewart and the magnificent McKellen] and generally well-choreographed action scenes all combine to make one of the very best comic book adaptations. [However, if comic books and super-heroes leave you cold, X-Men probably will as well.] NOTE: Although the character of Sabretooth figured very heavily in the prequel X-Men Origins: Wolverine, in this film Sabretooth and Wolverine don't even seem to know one another.

Verdict: All Systems Go! ***1/2.

X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE

X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE (2009). Director: Gavin Hood.

Following the trilogy of X-Men films, this movie focuses on perhaps the group's most popular member: James Logan, AKA Wolverine. The story actually begins back in the 19th century [Logan's mutant healing factor has also given him a very long life] where Logan (Hugh Jackman), discovering his nature and his claws [see photo] as a young teen, kills the man who murdered his mother -- only to learn that he's his true father, and his cousin Victor Creed (Liev Schreiber of the Scream films] is actually his brother. The two men become warriors, fighting down through the years in everything from the Civil War to Vietnam. The story proper begins in modern times, when Colonel William Stryker (Danny Huston), offers the two mutant men a chance to use their powers as mercenaries. But Logan is sickened by the things they do on their missions, and quits, earning the "abandoned" Victor's eternal enmity [in the comics I believe this character was later known as Sabretooth]. When Logan's girlfriend (Lynn Collins) is murdered by Creed, Logan seeks revenge, and Stryker turns him into "Weapon X" by filling his skeleton with the hardest known element, adamantium. But Logan learns that Stryker is not to be trusted and breaks out on his own. Through another mutant named Gambit (Taylor Kitsch), Logan eventually discovers where Stryker is holding kidnapped young mutants, hoping to make another super-mutant weapon. He has to battle not only his hated brother, but also this new super-being in the exciting climax.

X-Men Origins: Wolverine is well-acted, directed, and edited, with beautiful photography by Donald McAlpine. Some of the action scenes, stunt work, and effects are spectacular, though I imagine that people who haven't seen the previous films nor are familiar with the X-Men will follow much of what's going on. Cyclops appears [as a younger man], Patrick Stewart as Professor Xavier has a cameo at the end, and there's even an appearance by Fred J. Dukes AKA the Blob (Kevin Durand) in the film's most amusing sequence.

Verdict: A lot of high-powered, noisy, intense comic book fun. ***.

2009 OSCARS

2009 OSCARS Sunday February 22nd, 2009. 81st Annual Academy Awards.

Usually I find watching the boring, ad-choked Oscars about as appealing as getting root canal surgery. A friend of mine told me that tonight they were trying something completely different -- the Oscars would be presented as part of a story or film -- so we decided to give it a look see. The TV was turned on a bit early and let me tell you that 15 minutes of fawning "journalists" interviewing the "stars" as they arrived was more than enough. The Oscars began at 9PM but by 9:30 it seemed as if they'd already been on for an hour and a half. The ads, the introductions, the mostly tedious speeches as endless relatives and co-workers are thanked and thanked ...

Worse, the show was no different than it was in the past. Except for one thing: the deletion of clips. Yes, instead of showing clips from each nominated film and performance, past winners were presented on stage to tell each nominee how wonderful he or she was. It was at times maudlin and even insincere. But it also didn't make any sense. Does the Academy imagine that everyone has seen every film? Frankly, I've seen few of the nominated films and I would have loved to see clips of a few of the performances (and I've no doubt the actors feel the same way!). Didn't it occur to the Academy that some of the millions of people watching might see something they liked so much in one of the clips that they'd buy a movie theater ticket or DVD. I mean, isn't that what it's all about -- getting people into theaters? (The Oscars have less and less to do with art.)

Hugh Jackman made a pleasant and competent host, but his big "musicals are back" production number was pure kitsch. Some of the awards were duller than ditch water and should have been covered in a separate ceremony. I didn't think much of the songs that were nominated for "Best Song," although they had a good beat and instrumentation. I liked Best Actor Sean Penn's speech for the most part, and I especially liked the heart-felt speech given by Milk screenwriter Dustin Lance Black. I thought Queen Latifah did a nice job singing "I'll Be Seeing You" as photos of recently departed Hollywood folk flashed across the screen (you could hardly see the first, Cyd Charisse, however).

The Oscars were actually over by 11:55, which I didn't think would be possible.

Verdict: **. Not enough highlights-- and no clips!

VAN HELSING

VAN HELSING (2004). Director/writer: Stephen Sommers.

The church employs an amnesiac named Van Helsing (Hugh Jackman) to hunt down and kill all spirits and monsters of darkness, and after defeating an inexplicably giant-sized Mr. Hyde, he is assigned to destroy Dracula and his sexy brides. Helping him with his task is a Transylvanian lovely (Kate Beckinsale, in very contemporary bustier), and a geeky friar. Although this film was released by Universal, it plays much more like a parody of Hammer Horror Films of the sixties and seventies than of the Universal monster flicks of the forties. Unfortunately the campy approach – as it so often does – means that it's impossible to really care about what happens to the one-dimensional characters, and the film falls flat on its feet. [True, James Whale's classic Bride of Frankenstein was itself a parody of Frankenstein, but at least it recreated a period atmosphere; Van Helsing, like Xena and Buffy, the Vampire Slayer, has a very 21st century approach.] The movie's main strength is some striking scenic design, some very effective action scenes, and first-rate special effects, which include winged vampire-women who fly around a town square picking up struggling victims [these vampires are incredibly strong it seems]. There are some interesting concepts in the movie – Dracula wants to use the life energy inside the Frankenstein monster's body to resuscitate thousands of his vampire bat-like children (remember those brides?) -- but after awhile it simply gets too silly and busy for its own good. Jackman and Beckinsale manage to hold on to their dignity, but Richard Roxburgh's over-the-top and perfectly dreadful performance makes him the all-time worst Dracula of the cinema. This is House of Dracula for the “frat boy” generation.

Verdict: If you really love these old movies, forget about this and watch the Universal –or Hammer – films on DVD again. *1/2.