GENTLEMEN MARRY BRUNETTES

Jane Russell and Scott Brady in Paris

GENTLEMEN MARRY BRUNETTES (1955). Director: Richard Sale.

Connie Jones (Jeanne Crain) is annoyed that her sister Bonnie (Jane Russell) can't stop herself from accepting one proposal after another from smitten gentlemen. The two flee from New York to Paris where they somehow become the toast of the town due to the efforts of Rudy Vallee (playing a kind of slimy variation of himself) and wannabee managers David (Scott Brady) and Charlie (Alan Young). The ladies are booked into several high-tone establishments but are always fired when they refuse to wear the highly immodest outfits that the managements propose. Ensconced in a hotel room and wondering how they'll pay the bill, they suddenly find they have a unknown benefactor who is plying them with gifts -- everything from gowns, diamonds and poodles to a luxury car complete with chauffeur. Wondering what their mysterious benefactor will expect when he finally introduces himself, they accept an invitation to perform in Monte Carlo in Monaco, where the truth will finally come out.

Jane Russell and Jeanne Crain

Gentlemen Marry Brunettes, a sort of sequel to Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, exists in a separate universe of its own that has absolutely no relation to reality. It is never explained how or why David even knows of the existence of the sisters, or why Charlie, who turns out to be very wealthy, shares a garret with David and has to resort to stealing newspapers and food. (Yes, there's something about his father's edict that he can't spend money on himself, but food?) For that matter, why is Rudy Vallee, who can't really sing a note if we're being honest, playing himself? 

Ain't Misbehavin': Alan Young in a gorilla suit!

Then there are the song numbers. The original songs are pretty awful and the versions of classic songs such as Rodgers and Hart's "My Funny Valentine" are poorly done. The absolute nadir of this film -- and possibly of virtually every musical that ever came out of Hollywood -- is Alan Young croaking "Ain't Misbehavin'" while wearing a gorilla suit. (This is during a so-called African number that is performed in Monte Carlo.) The performances are pretty much what you would expect, perfectly adept and professional, with Crain in an unusual role for her. Jane does her own singing, Brady and Crain are dubbed aside from one number, and I'm not sure about Young except that he or whoever dubbed him sings flat. 

Scott Brady and Jeanne Crain

Despite all of this Gentlemen Marry Brunettes moves along swiftly and is never especially offensive. Jane Russell is in her usual butch-femme mode throughout, and Young is more femme than butch. The film is greatly bolstered by obvious location filming in both Paris and Monte Carlo, although there is back lot work as well. My favorite line is quoted by Young as spoken by his rather horrible father: "Every time you enter a room it's like somebody left."

Verdict: At least there are great views of Paris and Monaco in CinemaScope and Technicolor! **1/2.